Definitions by Van Jermaine

Canadian Air Guitar 

An oral sex act similar to cunnilingus, except the female's genitalia is talked down to and criticized in disapproval.

Logan's Canadian Air Guitar skills have cost him his last three relationships.

Canadian Air Guitar by Van Jermaine October 13, 2016

Japanese Hurricane 

While receiving a rim job, the recipient tightly grasps the back of the givers head and violently shits in their face.

Susan's hair looks looks like it survived a Japanese Hurricane.

Japanese Hurricane by Van Jermaine October 13, 2016

Kansas City Earmuffs 

When you bust a load in two barbecue filled condoms and simultaneously smack a chick over her ears right when she wakes up.

Allison went to bed early so I surprised her with some Kansas City Earmuffs in the morning.

Kansas City Earmuffs by Van Jermaine October 12, 2016

Cincinnati Swan Dive 

Highly dangerous sexual maneuver performed when a man is engaged in the doggy style position at the the edge of a balcony. Suddenly and in one motion he grabs her by both arms, climaxes, and thrusts her off the balcony full force while showering her with semen as she falls.

Since her Cincinnati Swan Dive and the damage done to the left side of her brain, Deborah cannot speak and has been eating out of a straw.

Cincinnati Swan Dive by Van Jermaine October 12, 2016

Mexican Magic Trick 

This classic involves faking a severe heart attack right before climaxing. As she's picking up the phone and dialing 911, you dump your load on the back of her head and run out the door.

The last time I performed a Mexican Magic Trick was when I had a one-night stand with the waitress we met at the bus stop.

Mexican Magic Trick by Van Jermaine October 11, 2016

San Antonio Breakfast Salad 

When a man is getting his salad tossed, he ejaculates on the back of his hand just before shitting in her face. When she pulls away he backhand slaps her across the head.

Meredith won't return my calls after I gave her a San Antonio Breakfast Salad.

San Antonio Breakfast Salad by Van Jermaine October 11, 2016

Pasadena Pitchfork 

Highly skilled maneuver that involves a man double fisting a woman while simultaneously receiving fellatio and taking a shit on the toilet.

I accidentally walked in on Darrel giving a Pasadena Pitchfork at grandma's house last week.

Pasadena Pitchfork by Van Jermaine October 11, 2016