The Working Dead's definitions

Bitchorcist

A person capable of subduing or driving out the Bitch spirit from the woman it has possessed.

Dale would never have gotten Teri to sign his expense report if he hadn't brought Lisa along as his Bitchorcist

by The Working Dead September 17, 2016

pity click

Noun or verb: Sympathetically clicking "like" or an emoticon on the posting of an unattractive or unpopular FaceBook friend in order to help maintain the life-sustaining illusion that their lives are interesting. A low risk / low effort virtual version of the Pity Fuck.

Unaware that all of Lisa's responses to his FaceBook postings were just pity clicks, Warren made a beeline for her at the class reunion, thinking after 25 years he would finally score..

by The Working Dead June 30, 2016

Unpurpose

Business Term (Verb): To undermine the utility of a business meeting through participation, or to extinguish the meaning and impact of a presentation or letter by editing it or adding his own unsolicited thoughts.

Thanks to some stupid fucker inviting him, Kevin was able unpurpose the meeting in about five minutes

by The Working Dead July 10, 2016

apex defecator

A person, who by virtual of their physical size or dietary habits, produces bowel movements that dominate the fecosystem.

Ben froze in his tracks and backed slowly away from the stall, breathing only through his mouth. From the carnage within, it was clear he had blundered into the lair of an apex defecator

by The Working Dead June 30, 2016

Cracker Barrel

Noun: A large assembly of crackers, usually associated with country music or Donald Trump

"Man, that Toby Keith concert last night was the biggest Cracker Barrel I have seen in a long time."

by The Working Dead July 13, 2019

Scrooge mumble

(Noun) An indistinct utterance used in public places to repel people asking for money. Delivered in a polite and apologetic tone, but without eye contact or any intelligible words that could be used as the basis for a conversation.

A homeless guy hit me up just as I got to the front door of the restaurant, but I warded him off with a Scrooge mumble and ducked inside safely, wallet intact.

by The Working Dead October 8, 2016

dicktitious

(Adjective) An intentionally false or unintentionally distorted interpretation of an event when recounted by an asshole. Often used vindictively or, or selectively target blame after something has gone wrong.

As if the argument with Kevin after the staff meeting wasn't fun enough, his dicktitious account of of it up the chain of command scored me 45 minutes with Cheryl from HR, getting the whole Professional Behavior and Careful Communications lecture.

by The Working Dead October 8, 2016