The Professor's definitions

antidisistablishmentarienism

A word that doesn't mean anything because some botard can't spell for shit.

I think I'm smart, so I'll put a big word in the UD. However, I will only succeed in subjecting myself to ridicule because I can't actually spell.

by The Professor January 5, 2005

marto

(v) To use ones partner as a kitchen cleaning implement

After he had martoed with her the counter top was clean and shiny

by the professor November 10, 2003

I'll never wash my cheek

Is usually used following an unexpected display of affection (typically a kiss) from a person whom one has a crush on.

While I am unsure of the exact etymology of the phrase, I can remember first hearing it on an old Brady Bunch episode when Marcia Brady said it after Davy Jones from the Monkees kissed her on the cheek.

"I can't believe Davy Jones kissed me! I'll never wash this cheek again."

by The Professor July 11, 2004

motherfucker

If a couple had a child and attempt to have another or just plain having sex, then the man is a motherfucker due to the fact that the man's spouse became a mother after having a child. Hence making the man(father) a motherfucker.

Your father is a motherfucker.

by The Professor March 31, 2003

lumberjack

The man who sings

I'm a lumberjack and I'm O.K.
I sleep all night and I work all day
I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shopping
And have buttered scones for tea.

CHORUS
He's a lumberjack and he's O.K.
He sleeps all night
And Works all day.

I chop down trees, I skip and jump
I like to press wild flowers
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars

I cut down trees, I wear high heels
Suspenders and a bra.
I want to be a girlee
Just like my dear papa.

by The Professor June 28, 2004

Patrick Moore

One who plays the xylophone.

Give him a mallet, and he becomes a real Patrick Moore.

by The Professor November 7, 2003

Noiners

a mutilation of a german word

Jesus! Who adds an 'ers' to Noin?

by The Professor June 28, 2004