42 definitions by Talmanes

Someone who gives every appearance of being homosexual, but is in fact heterosexual. A fauxmosexual male may display metrosexual attention to hygiene, style, and culture, have an effeminate speech pattern or display effeminate behavoir in gesticulation and mannerism, and/or give the basic impression of being gay. A faumosexual female may be fairly butch in appearance and style, display a militant feminist ("feminazi") attitude toward men, or show strong proclivities toward Lilith Fair or other female empowerment. These are the people you "just know" are gay, but who seem to show proof to the contrary.
People say that Tom Cruise is gay, but I think he's just a fauxmosexual.

I work with this guy who wears nuthugger jeans and talks with a total San Fran lisp, but apparently he's not actually a fag; he's just a fauxmosexual.

I totally thought Liz was a dyke because of her shaved head and leather, but I met her boyfriend yesterday. Talk about textbook fauxmosexual.
by Talmanes December 26, 2005
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n.pl. or An oft-heard country mispronunciation of "hundred," that being a numerical value equal to 10 x 10, numbering between 99 and 101.
I gave that dancer at the titty bar a hunnert dollar bill.

There're a hunnert reasons I shouldn't marry you, Suzie, and most of 'em is that I'm already married to Betty.

I musta told you a hunnert times not to do that!
by Talmanes February 6, 2006
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Acronym for "when I fucking feel like it." Useful as a catch-all answer for when you're going to get something done.
Boss: When are those floors gonna get swept?
Employee: Wiffli.

A: When are we going to the store tomorrow, anyway?
B: Probably wiffli and not before.

I'll get to it wiffli, man. Don't get all bent out of shape.
by Talmanes October 29, 2007
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A. 1. n. Combining the words "beer" and "beef" to mean a beer whose smoky or rich aftertaste reminds you of meat. Generally a dark beer or heavy lager.

B. 1. v. Combining the words "beer" and "barf" to mean vomiting caused by consumption of alcohol (primarily beer). 2. n. The product of vomiting caused by consumption of alcohol (primarily beer).
Man, taste this--I think the flavor is rich enough to be considered beerf.

Man, let me get some more of that beerf! I'm hungry!

Oh, dude... I think I'm gonna beerf. Get me a bucket.

Disgusting! I've got beerf all over my shoes!
by Talmanes March 1, 2006
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1. (n) Sammitz is a mispronunciation of the word "sandwich" by way of the more common mispronunciation, "sammich," and likewise has connotations of special goodness or quality.

2. (n) Used as part of the phrase "go make me a sammitz," which can mean many things, including "go do something else," "go do something for me that I don't want to do myself," or the obvious, "go make me a sandwich."
1. Damn, this is a good-ass sammitz!

2. Why are you all up in my grill? Bitch, go make me a sammitz!
by Talmanes January 6, 2005
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The combination of "Irish" and "Italian," generally referring to the very common American descendants of Irish and Italian immigrants. For some strange reason, the two tend to be drawn together.
Johnny took six shots and then made out with Kirsten? Damn, those Iretalians don't play!
by Talmanes October 6, 2006
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A portmanteau of "virginity" and "dignity," virdignity is the kind of self-respect and pride you can only lose once, and then never again. The end of an undefeated record, falling off the wagon after a long term of sobriety, sharting your pants for the first time (especially when said hard fart happens around witnesses)--these would all be extreme examples of a loss of virdignity. For the most part, one only realizes virdignity exists once it's been lost.
Oh, shit--Chaz just fell down and split his pants! There goes his virdignity at this job!

Jenny was going down on me the other day, and I totally cut one. Complete loss of virdignity, man.

Hey, I've still never gotten an STD, unlike you sluts. My virdignity is intact.
by Talmanes December 2, 2006
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