42 definitions by Talmanes
A phrase used to describe the actions of someone who gives copious amounts of oral sex, well above what most people would consider an average amount for a sexually active person. As job is to career, so blow job is to blow career--someone who gives "blow careers" has almost taken oral sex to an extreme level, pursuing it as if there's some sort of reward in the afterlife for people who give that much head.
Man, Suzie went down on the entire football team at the party last week. That girl doesn't just give blow jobs--she's got a blow career!
I thought my last girlfriend was good about oral, but this girl I'm seeing now comes out of nowhere with it sometimes. I get head two, three times a day without asking, like it's her blow career.
Dude, I feel sorry for Tyrone. His ass went to prison and bitched out, and now he's got himself a blow career on the inside.
I thought my last girlfriend was good about oral, but this girl I'm seeing now comes out of nowhere with it sometimes. I get head two, three times a day without asking, like it's her blow career.
Dude, I feel sorry for Tyrone. His ass went to prison and bitched out, and now he's got himself a blow career on the inside.
by Talmanes December 2, 2006
The state of anticipating or expecting sexual intercourse from a social encounter, be it a date, a party, or a booty call. It describes a period of optimistic waiting that is just shy of a sure thing.
A: Girl, you gonna give him some?
B: I don't know, but he's sexpecting.
On the ride home from that date, the sexpectation was killing me!
Just because you sexpect something doesn't mean you're getting it.
B: I don't know, but he's sexpecting.
On the ride home from that date, the sexpectation was killing me!
Just because you sexpect something doesn't mean you're getting it.
by Talmanes November 15, 2005
A phrase taken from a popular joke. To say someone is "in the barrel" or "taking a turn in the barrel" means it's their turn to do an unpleasant task or to suffer an unpleasant experience. The joke is as follows:
A sailor on a Navy ship had been out to sea for weeks, and was beginning to go through sex withdrawals. Fed up with the lack of sex, he asked one of his shipmates what he did when the pressure was too much to take.
"Well, there's a barrel with a hole in it near the mop storage. When it gets to be too much for us, we use that."
So the sailor went over to the barrel and decided to give it a go. Finding it was better than he'd expected, he began using it regularly, and his problems seemed to vanish.
After a couple of weeks, his commanding officer began to take notice, and said, "You seem to be a lot more relaxed. What's your secret?"
The sailor, embarrassed to give a straight answer, simply said he'd been getting better rest.
"Well good, sailor. You're going to need it," replied the officer. "Today's your turn in the barrel."
"Well, there's a barrel with a hole in it near the mop storage. When it gets to be too much for us, we use that."
So the sailor went over to the barrel and decided to give it a go. Finding it was better than he'd expected, he began using it regularly, and his problems seemed to vanish.
After a couple of weeks, his commanding officer began to take notice, and said, "You seem to be a lot more relaxed. What's your secret?"
The sailor, embarrassed to give a straight answer, simply said he'd been getting better rest.
"Well good, sailor. You're going to need it," replied the officer. "Today's your turn in the barrel."
by Talmanes December 10, 2004
A phrase coined by Teresa Strasser of the Adam Carolla Show on Free FM which refers to social outings that would normally be considered dates, but where one of the two people involved seems completely oblivious to the concept of dating. This is generally characterized by a lack of interest in conversation or flirting, an aimless absence of direction or goals for the evening, and possibly an uncomfortable revelation that the event was never intended to be date. This can be blamed on the modern tendency for self-absorption and a narcissistic belief that you shouldn't have to put forth any effort to be interesting or even pleasant.
I ended up going on a vague date with Jim. We went and saw a stupid buddy comedy and ate at Starbucks, but he split when he got a phone call from a friend to play basketball.
I don't even know if the date I was on with Nancy was a date, because she kept talking to me about how great it was to be single. I think it was some weird vague date.
I don't even know if the date I was on with Nancy was a date, because she kept talking to me about how great it was to be single. I think it was some weird vague date.
by Talmanes May 14, 2007
(v) To believe you have great insight or comprehension of a word, concept, or situation but to be entirely wrong about it (i.e., eisegesis). Portmanteau of "dunder" and "understand".
by Talmanes December 20, 2013
A portmanteauof "retarded" and "petard," it describes a plan backfiring on you in such a way that you are left looking utterly ridiculous. It combines the concept of retarded--which is to say mentally deficient--and the phrase "hoisted by your own petard," which means to have damage done to you by the means you had intended to employ to damage others. A petard is an explosive used to break down barricades in warfare, and so petarded can also mean "blown up," in some circumstances.
You ratted Dan out for stealing that camera, but in doing so proved that you were his accomplice? Dude, you're petarded.
Jim just petarded the front door trying to take out his ex, but the door blew up and a shard of it went through his windshield. Totally petarded.
Jim just petarded the front door trying to take out his ex, but the door blew up and a shard of it went through his windshield. Totally petarded.
by Talmanes December 2, 2006
Phrase used to describe something which is not heterosexual, it would literally be applied toward homosexuality. It is, however, more often applied pejoratively to negative situations, being used in place of gay when saying that something is lame or stupid.
Dude, you ate all of my donuts? That is so not hetero.
Seriously, guys, you need to stop talking about how often you watch America's Next Top Model. It's not hetero.
When Jess and Steve sit together on the bench with their arms around each other, I want to say it's seriously not hetero, but I know they're straight.
Seriously, guys, you need to stop talking about how often you watch America's Next Top Model. It's not hetero.
When Jess and Steve sit together on the bench with their arms around each other, I want to say it's seriously not hetero, but I know they're straight.
by Talmanes December 2, 2006