After No Nut November and Don't Dick December, Jerk Job January offers relief after 61 days of fasting from the act of masturbation.
I cannot take it anymore, Jerk Job January is the greates...ohohoh
*rub sounds can be heard*
ohhhhhhh
*61 splats occur simultaneously*
*rub sounds can be heard*
ohhhhhhh
*61 splats occur simultaneously*
by SliceofJesus January 04, 2018
Basically your giant dinosaur turkey looking monster bird that lives amongst the cane toads and banana farmers. Has a deadly claw on it that kills. Can be found in Papua New Guinea eating cannibals and other afro looking folks. Beware of mistaking it for an emu, a deadly mistake it could be.
Tourist 1: "I am gonna pat this ostrich."
Tourist 2: "I think that is an emu!"
Local Bloke: " It's a cassowary, don't touch..."
Cassowary: *screams and gobbles like turkey*
Tourist 1: "Ahhhhh! Me big bird! It's mauled me big bird!"
Tourist 2: "Hahaha! ... I mean, ohhh, you ok."
Local Bloke: *Brings out boomerang*
Tourist 1: "Hurry up. Use it!"
Local Bloke: "I can't kill you, euthanasia is illegal."
Tourist 1: "Use it on the turkey ostrich you moron!"
Local Bloke: "They are endangered, can't do anything. See ya!"
Tourist 2: "I think that is an emu!"
Local Bloke: " It's a cassowary, don't touch..."
Cassowary: *screams and gobbles like turkey*
Tourist 1: "Ahhhhh! Me big bird! It's mauled me big bird!"
Tourist 2: "Hahaha! ... I mean, ohhh, you ok."
Local Bloke: *Brings out boomerang*
Tourist 1: "Hurry up. Use it!"
Local Bloke: "I can't kill you, euthanasia is illegal."
Tourist 1: "Use it on the turkey ostrich you moron!"
Local Bloke: "They are endangered, can't do anything. See ya!"
by SliceofJesus January 17, 2017
Pronounced (Ni-erk)
A person who assaults or kills a suspected pedophile who turns out to be innocent making the njerk look more like a jerk rather than a hero for killing that person who was suspected of being a pedo.
A person who assaults or kills a suspected pedophile who turns out to be innocent making the njerk look more like a jerk rather than a hero for killing that person who was suspected of being a pedo.
Who are we prosecuting today, oh, just another njerk that was controlled by the media to think that that bloke was a pedo. Shame.
by SliceofJesus January 11, 2017
One of the 11 Spicers of herbs that KFC let loose on the world to produce alternative facts to demonstrate that the media has it wrong on the KFC recipe and all of Trump's ideologies.
Sean Spicer your salad with alternative american pepper which is organic and saves the world from the middle east inporting spices and terrorists.
by SliceofJesus February 05, 2017
Ajit Pai's idea to completely ruin the internet.
It will be $5 to read the full version of this definition. Call your internet service provider to access the full definition. You will most likely have an indian pick up your phone. He is Ajit Pai's brother. Good luck in trying to get full access to this definition!
It will be $5 to read the full version of this definition. Call your internet service provider to access the full definition. You will most likely have an indian pick up your phone. He is Ajit Pai's brother. Good luck in trying to get full access to this definition!
by SliceofJesus December 14, 2017
Its the thangsgiving mixed in with the fourth of July for Australia. The day all the lambs of the nation are sent to the slaughterhouse for a great barbie and many prawns (also known as shrimp) are fished from the waters for dessert. Then the fireworks go off, to celebrate the day that all Australians call their own. It is Australia Day, a day where you'll never lamb alone!
by SliceofJesus January 21, 2017
Yahya Jammeh is ousted but throws a tanty and The Gambia is invaded.
Donald Trump is sworn in as America's 1st racist president of the 21st Century.
James Gargasoulas runs over 20+ good, hardworking people and children because he is on bail.
Summary of January 20 2017, when many thought 2016 was bad as a whole. A day worse than an entire year.
Donald Trump is sworn in as America's 1st racist president of the 21st Century.
James Gargasoulas runs over 20+ good, hardworking people and children because he is on bail.
Summary of January 20 2017, when many thought 2016 was bad as a whole. A day worse than an entire year.
Person 1: January 20, don't mention it, because it breaks my heart.
Person 2: But...it's my birthday!
Person 2: But...it's my birthday!
by SliceofJesus January 20, 2017