Cassowary
Basically your giant dinosaur turkey looking monster bird that lives amongst the cane toads and banana farmers. Has a deadly claw on it that kills. Can be found in Papua New Guinea eating cannibals and other afro looking folks. Beware of mistaking it for an emu, a deadly mistake it could be.
Tourist 1: "I am gonna pat this ostrich."
Tourist 2: "I think that is an emu!"
Local Bloke: " It's a cassowary, don't touch..."
Cassowary: *screams and gobbles like turkey*
Tourist 1: "Ahhhhh! Me big bird! It's mauled me big bird!"
Tourist 2: "Hahaha! ... I mean, ohhh, you ok."
Local Bloke: *Brings out boomerang*
Tourist 1: "Hurry up. Use it!"
Local Bloke: "I can't kill you, euthanasia is illegal."
Tourist 1: "Use it on the turkey ostrich you moron!"
Local Bloke: "They are endangered, can't do anything. See ya!"
Tourist 2: "I think that is an emu!"
Local Bloke: " It's a cassowary, don't touch..."
Cassowary: *screams and gobbles like turkey*
Tourist 1: "Ahhhhh! Me big bird! It's mauled me big bird!"
Tourist 2: "Hahaha! ... I mean, ohhh, you ok."
Local Bloke: *Brings out boomerang*
Tourist 1: "Hurry up. Use it!"
Local Bloke: "I can't kill you, euthanasia is illegal."
Tourist 1: "Use it on the turkey ostrich you moron!"
Local Bloke: "They are endangered, can't do anything. See ya!"
Cassowary by SliceofJesus January 17, 2017
