Consultants of Swing

Specialist consultants brought in to tip the balance of vital swing stages during elections.
The Donald: We're down in the polls, bring in the consultants of swing for Florida.
Advisor: I'm on it

The Donald: Remember, no Russians. NO COLUSION.
by RandyRhoads84 May 21, 2020
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Govinda Jira Jira

A hymn like prayer/chant that project managers use when pleading with the gods that they've chosen the right amount of slack and that their plans are delivered on time and to cost.

Based on the traditional Indian hymn - Govinda (Jaya Jaya) - made famous by Kula Shaker.
Michael: just finished my project plan, going to pray it's delivered to spec. (Starts chanting Govinda Jira Jira)
Steve W: Fingers crossed, otherwise that prick Mark will give you hell . Govinda Jira Jira
by RandyRhoads84 June 09, 2021
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Shlong

A cocktail made of shloer grape juice and long island iced tea. Ideally served with the waiter's balls immersed at the top of the glass, to add a salty kick.
I'm so hungover today. I went overboard on the shlongs last night!
by RandyRhoads84 June 02, 2020
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Ass. Consultant

Abbreviation for 'Associate Consultant', some bullshit job title to give younger employees a false sense of hope that their job means something. Commonly found in rural consultancies in St. Ives. Sometimes loaned out sexually to clients to secure deals.
Client: 'The proposal is pretty good, but the quote is too high'
Hobb Knob: 'Have one of my ass. consultants for the night, not the yank though, he's spoiled goods and has an arse like a grapefruit'
Client: 'Deal, we'll sign off in the morning'
by RandyRhoads84 December 26, 2016
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Someone else's bonzai tree

Especially relevant in big companies. When you develop an intricate, sought after skill set, but never rise to the level that was possible from your early potential, that may have been/still could be achievable elsewhere.
Zach has a PhD from an ivy league college, and has built enviable experience, but has never risen above director level in the blue chip company he works for. He's become little more than someone else's bonzai tree, and should probably leave, in order to become a red wood.
by RandyRhoads84 October 23, 2023
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Hotel Rwanda

A 2004 film, also a sarcastic name for the refugee camp that some asylum seekers in the UK will be sent to in Rwanda.
Steve W: Where are Jitnesh and his family?
Michael C: They've been sent to Hotel Rwanda.
Steve W: About time! The Rwanda scheme had cost the taxpayer hundreds of millions, with no asylum seekers deported
Michael C: Yep. I hear that in the Hotel Rwanda, you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
by RandyRhoads84 January 17, 2024
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Up the bumble

When you meet a girl on the bumble dating app and successfully secure anal.
Michael: What did you do last night Lawrence?
Lawrence: I met up with this eastern european bird from bumble and took her up the arse.
Michael: Up the bumble, The holy grail!
by RandyRhoads84 November 27, 2020
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