RandyRhoads84's definitions

Jerking From Home

The art of telling your employer that you will be working from home, when your sole intention is to stream youporn all day.

Stace: Michael, when were you last in the office?
Michael: It's been months now, I've been (JFH) jerking from home

Stace: Okay, some were worried that you had a massive stroke or something

Michael: You're not too far off the mark...

by RandyRhoads84 June 17, 2020

It wasn't me

Hit 90s song by Shaggy, and also general stance taken by Hamas and wider Palestinians on the October 7th massacre, despite the perpetrators having filmed themselves commiting the atrocities and sharing videos on social media.

War criminal lawyer: This time and date stamped CCTV footage clearly shows you and your accomplice coldly gunning down an elderly Israeli in his Kibbutz.
Hamas war criminal: It wasn't me

by RandyRhoads84 December 19, 2023

I got you Abe

When Western Israeli allies step in to provide support to Israel after the latest Hamas terror attack.

Benjamin Netanyahu: Hamas extremists massacred over 1200 innocent Israelis during the October 7th attacks. Israel is surrounded by enemies.

President Biden: I got you Abe

by RandyRhoads84 December 24, 2023

Modern shart

Accidental shit that was wrongly anticipated to be a fart, which when left to dry forms a sometimes interesting crusted pattern on underwear.

Sold for a lucrative profit to any number of tosser art dealers who interpret the soiled garment(s) as the work of divine genius.

Those scotch bonnets last night led to accidental sharting earlier. I nearly threw away my Calvin Kleins! Luckily I had the sense to dry them on the radiator and sell the result for six figures on ebay to this insane art dealer. who thought the image looked like the last supper. I call in modern shart!

by RandyRhoads84 December 22, 2020

Wookey hole

Another name for vagina, also a series of caves in South West England.

Nick: why did you break up with Mal?
Stella: because he stuck his cock in Haz's wookey hole
Nick: I see. I guess that's why she's called Haz - because everyone has.

by RandyRhoads84 December 22, 2020

Nonce sense

A person with an uncanny ability to spot a nonce (paedophile) on first site.

I always thought Jimmy Savile was a paedo. My nonce sense was off the chart.

by RandyRhoads84 September 14, 2021

Chubbthumping

When a person has a fetish for having sex with fat girls.

Duncan: What did you get up to last night?
Woolhead: I had sex with a fat bird.
Duncan: Ah, you were out Chubbthumping again.

by RandyRhoads84 September 5, 2021