Definitions by QuacksO
IKIA effect
The feeling that an action or object is more special/virtuous/valuable if it was performed or acquired while riding/driving in a KIA automobile.
"KIA --- the power to surprise." If you actually believe in the IKIA effect, you will certainly experience some "surprise", all right --- anything that happens while being transported by a KIA vehicle probably will not actually be any more amazing or notable than if it occurred in any other common brand of car.
IKIA effect by QuacksO May 30, 2018
Clue Clucks Clan
The Clue Clucks Clan has been known to ceremoniously incinerate the -carcasses of deceased-merely-due-to-old-age hens, but they never sacrifices a live chicken, since they honestly believe that they need each and every one of their domesticated pheasants to listen to and supposedly obtain valuable insights/knowledge from.
Clue Clucks Clan by QuacksO May 29, 2018
dillemma
A acutely-troublesome quandary experienced by dudes who are so fond of dill that they like to have some with every meal, plus they are only attracted to gals named Emma.
Since dill is only available through mail-order either in its dried form or as seeds, the only practical way out of a dillemma is to either live near a greenhouse-farm where dill can be grown all year round, or else build your own mini-greenhouse so that you can grow some yourself, and thus have the heavenly-aromatic and tasty fresh fronds available to harvest for every meal. As for dating ladies named Emma, well, the best of luck to ya on THAT account --- years back it was a common enough name, but it's not nearly so popular nowadays, so you might hafta settle for cuddle-bugs old enough to be your great-gramma.
waiter
Someone who unobtrusively hangs around a place of business that often has a large volume of customers (supermarket, department store, hotel, etc.), and watches for opportunities to "scavenge for leftovers" and otherwise save money on stuff that he can utilize in his own life. Examples of these opportunities could include finishing/gathering uneaten remains of a family's meal after the group leaves the table, catching an opening/closing door of a coin-operated restroom to keep it from latching when a paying restroom-user is exiting/leaving so that the waiter can slip in and use the facility without having to drop in his own quarter to get the door unlocked again, etc.
If a waiter is part of a sizeable low-income family, several members of his family may be recruited to discretely hang out in various locations around town, so that multiple scrounging/money-saving opportunities can be simultaneously observed on the same day. For example, the husband might sit quietly in a corner of the local service-garage and ask customers for their used motor-oil so that he can take it home and burn it for heat in his specially-designed furnace, while the wife and/or older children spend a few hours at the city park and watch for fellow relaxation-seeking visitors to toss returnable beverage-containers into the area's trash cans.
Jbano syndrome
A syndrome of a consumerism-driven "just buy a new one" lifestyle. A major causation factor of the National Debt, instances of this horridly-wasteful debacle can often be solved with as little as a few minutes of simple cleaning/repair-work, or a far-less-expensive used item can be procured. Long live thrift stores!
Jbano syndrome also has a kissing-cousin disorder known as Jbao ("Just buy another one") syndrome, which similarly involves needlessly purchasing one or more additional items, but for an even more pathetically-lame reason --- where the former unwise practice results from an item's being presently unusable due to actual damage, wear, soiling, or malfunction, Jbao syndrome stems from the original item's merely being presently inaccessible, such as from falling into a crack in the floor or behind a piece of furniture, being dropped into shallow water, getting lodged in a tall tree or on the roof of a house, etc. If the item were simply retrieved, it would be immediately usable again, without any cleaning or repair necessary. In some extreme cases, the item in question may not even be out of easy reach, but instead simply requires a slight upgrade or normal routine-maintenance, such as a circular-saw's needing a sharper blade, a lawn mower's needing a new spark plug, etc., not having a whole new appliance purchased.
Jbano syndrome by QuacksO May 24, 2018
love interest
Monthly payments you make to a current and/or ex romantic partner, either because you knocked up said partner, or to keep him/her quiet about shameful/potentially-damaging secrets from your torrid past with him/her.
One would be wise to either maintain a strictly platonic relationship with any "close" acquaintances, or at least always use protection during any and all bouncy-bouncies, to avoid excessive "financial drainage" from having to shell out for love interest.
love interest by QuacksO May 23, 2018
wedding serumony
If a black widow and a black widower decide to get hitched, it is often a miracle if they even make it through the wedding serumony without at least one coffin's being sent in.
wedding serumony by QuacksO May 22, 2018