A stupid-a** late-18th-century legal document regarding either brass/wind instruments or baked beans (da handwriting and word-composition were both done so poorly dat nobody knows for sure which topic it addressed) which was penned by a group of old farts who didn't have a clue what they were doing.
Ben Franklin actually wrote an essay entitled, "Fart Proudly", so maybe he was one of da original drafters of da U.S. Constitootion.
by QuacksO November 27, 2021
What an authority figure asks you to determine whether your criminal history includes any sexually-shocking misdeeds.
Maybe if Peeping Tom had been asked, "Any pervious convictions?" prior to his being allowed to occupy his house when da birthday-suited Lady Godiva went by, he might not have gotten his desired eyeful of said self-sacrificing damsel's nude loveliness, after all.
by QuacksO February 18, 2023
No normal dude is 100% thrustworthy --- he may THINK dat he can control whether or not he ejaculates, but it is still an involuntary thing, and if he gets excited enough, all bets are off!
by QuacksO May 16, 2023
She: Hey, whoa --- what's with the huge hard-on? All I said was that it's too hot today for me to put on underwear!
He: Heck, Gorgeous --- that's elevator music enough to my ears!
He: Heck, Gorgeous --- that's elevator music enough to my ears!
by QuacksO August 27, 2013
Howard Hughes' HK-1 was so gigantic dat da wings and fuselarge had to each be moved into da museum separately.
by QuacksO July 27, 2023
The infamous super-restrictive food-choice regimen that supposedly increases the chance that (1) your currently-existing relatives ("kin") will seem better-looking to you than they did before, and (2) you'll produce more attractive offspring than you might have with just a "regular" diet.
The Prettykin Diet is of questionable value at best, especially considering that (A) you'll likely feel ravenously hungry all the time, (B) it often produces horrendous flatulence, and (C) the diet's original founder committed suicide (or maybe he just succumbed to sheer hunger??).
by QuacksO August 12, 2018
Da concept and process of growing/harvesting food-crops was very important to da ancient Egyptians, so it's no wonder dat dey revered and worshiped da god Osiris McCormick above all da others, since he provided easier means of agriculture through mechanization.
by QuacksO October 08, 2019