QuacksO's definitions

alphabetical easements

Assorted "from A to Z" relief-from-standard-requirements allowances, such as:
beesement: Where someone else volunteers to "get a buzz" managing da apiary so dat you can clear yer head for a while
breezement: Where you are allowed to either "fart proudly" or avoid "having yer cheek visited too roughly" by passing air-currents
ceasement: Not having to stop something you enjoy
cheesement: Being allowed to eat softer milk-curd solids instead of firmer-textured selections like Swiss or cheddar
Cleesement: Not having to sit in on a group-viewing of "Fawlty Towers" re-runs
creasement: Not having people fuss if yer clothes aren't ironed
Creesement: Where you are free to treat all Native-American tribes da same way
feesement: Having a service-charge waived
freezement: Not making you shiver yer a** off working outdoors in colder weather
geesement: Not having to deal wif all those annoying big white "honkers" in da farmyard
geezement: Fellow humans' refraining from expressing displeasure about your faults
greasement: Having someone else operate da lubing-gun
jeezement: Same deal as two definitions back
keysement: Not having to DIDDLE wif those FIDDLY little brass lock-opener devices, like if your ride uses a wireless remote
kneesement: What those squishy-foam mats or padded strap-on cups allow yer leg-joints when squatting on hard/rough surfaces
leasement: Not having to sign an agreement to use a dwelling or property
leesement: Being allowed "safe harbor"

More alphabetical easements:
measement: Not having to just think of others all da time
niecement: Not having to deal wif yer kid-brother's bratty pigtailed ankle-biter
peasement: Not having to either shell sphere-shaped veggies or eat yucky cereal
pleasement: Not having to either kowtow to others or speak super-politely
queasement: Being given a rest-break 'cuz you're feeling "rumbly in yer tumbly"
Reesement: Being given an orange-wrapped candy bar to munch on
seesement: Not having to either keep yer eyes open or remember/report what you observe
seizement: Either having others keep their grabby hands off'n you, or having Loctite LB 8150 applied to metal parts
sleazement: Freedom from "shady" dealings
Smeesement: What Peter Pan got whenever Captain Hook's right-hand man was absent
sneezement: What cold-and-flu remedies hopefully will provide
spreesement: Relief from a noticeable uptick in something
squeezement: Not having to be subjected to a hardship or bear-hug
teasement: Having others either respect your feelings or not serve you disgusting herbal-brew
teesement: Not having to play golf, wear undershirts, or cross a certain letter of da alphabet
threesement: Being allowed to just deal wif either two-or-less or four-or-more items
treesement: Not having to deal wif large/tall plants
tweezement: Being allowed to leave your lashes/brows as they grow naturally
wheezement: What Pat McManus gains from following da MFFFF.
zeesement: Being allowed some shut-eye

by QuacksO June 15, 2024

Tisquantum Physics

An advanced high-school/college class dealing with the more complex scientific theories of Native American culture.

Tisquantum Physics is a good subject to learn if you want to be come a learned medicine man.

by QuacksO May 10, 2018

valetdictorian

Someone who is really good at parking/retrieving other peopel's cars without a scratch or dent.

Captain Crunch may mean well when he offers to park your car for you, but he's sure no valetdictorian!

by QuacksO February 19, 2019

coppertunist

Someone who is always on the lookout for chances to salvage discarded/unwanted copper to sell for scrap.

I don't mind coppertunists who just tootle door-to-door and respectfully ask people if they have any unwanted metal kicking around, or merely gather up already-discarded pieces that are simply strewn on the ground or lying beside the road... what really burns me up is the selfish.mean guys who actually steal other people's stockpiles of pipe/wire, or --- even worse --- rip the piping out from the walls of summer homes, hunting lodges, lakeside/fishing camps, etc., so that the cottages' unfortunate owners have to either replace it or go with plastic piping instead. Makes me also wonder if any of those same sneaky dudes have investments in the PEX industry!

by QuacksO October 3, 2017

wrist-twist compromise

Refers to where you and another male friend are "group-spooning" with a nice gal on the beach or in bed, and she has her "lower" arm/hand (i.e., the one from the shoulder that she's lying on) extended out in front of her and the dude whom she's spooning is contentedly clasping this hand. So of course you therefore wish to hold her "upper" hand, but the prob is that this would ordinarily oblige one of you to rotate your wrist an entire half-turn to position your hand palm-upwards, which would likely cause a somewhat-painful wrenching of your wrist. So instead, you both twist your wrists just a quarter of a turn so that your palms are facing each other, and then interlace your fingers.

My buddy and I were having a nice long group-spoon with Tiffany as a reward for our assisting her around the house for a few hours, and I ended up spooning her from behind. Well, naturally, I wanted to hold her hand, but it would have been too painful for either of us to turn our hand upwards --- especially after the strenuous housework-exertion that we had all just been through --- so we performed a wrist-twist compromise and thus were able to happily clasp hands all the same.

by QuacksO August 9, 2018

distrawt

How you feel from experiencing a deeply-upsetting event regarding dried grass-stalks, such as getting prickly bits all through your clothing after playfully rolling in it, being bombarded by loose swirling clouds of it during a windstorm, having to rake/sweep up mountains of it during your farm-chores, etc.

A classic example of being "distrawt" is if you've been secretly rendezvousing with a cute farmer's daughter, and her "paw" catches you two having a gleeful bouncy-bouncy in da barn-loft.

by QuacksO October 12, 2023

damming evidence

Irrefutable proof that beavers have been busy at the roadside culvert or drainage-ditch.

D.O.T. worker: A huge mass of sticks and logs beside the bridge that crosses a brook is all the damming evidence I need that Eager and his flat-tailed buddies have been at it again.

by QuacksO February 28, 2019