QuacksO's definitions

We needed the rain at this time

Da classic bu**s**t remark dat people use to try to make each other feel better regarding an unforeseen/inconvenient downpour.

Everyone's lawns and gardens were flourishing just dandy before today's torrential downpour, so why is everyone telling each other, "We needed the rain at this time"?! Who needs drenched muddy sidewalks and huge messy puddles all over town???

by QuacksO August 26, 2023

payrole

(1) A probationary status at your place of employment after having been convicted of either "padding" your work-hours or periodically snitching a few bucks from da cash register to supplement your take-home pay.
(2) A probation arrangement whereby you actually get paid a wage for behaving yourself.

Since ex-cons are often automatically suspected whenever a crime occurs in their vicinity, I was glad dat my work-release-program employer was able to definitively find out dat it was one of his regular employees who had been skimming da till, so dat my clean payrole-record didn't get undeservedly tarnished.

by QuacksO August 26, 2023

armed rubbery

Refers to a scenario whereby da "paw" of a lusted-after chick sits nearby with a double-barreled goose-blaster and keenly watches while you and his "little pumpkin" get it on, in order to make sure dat you always use a condom whenever you "go all da way" with her; da purpose, of course, is to avoid a "shotgun-wedding" type of situation nine months later!

Another definition for "armed rubbery" would be if you tell a hot gal's father dat you just wanna give his gorgeous daughter a naked massage, and so he and Brown Bess stand guard to ensure dat you two do indeed just stick to said firm caresses. :P

by QuacksO August 27, 2023

schizofraynia

A serious disorder of da brain caused by worn spots in cloth.

Kevlar clothing may not be da most comfortable to wear, but at least it keeps schizofraynia at bay.

by QuacksO August 27, 2023

Budafriend

A major Hungarian city where everyone is nice instead of being a pain in da butt.

Hungarian folks are already known for being soh-shuh-buhl to newcomers, so there should be not need to go all da way to Budafriend just to find smiling affable faces.

by QuacksO August 27, 2023

imposture

Someone who fakes Quasimodo's abnormally-crouched deformity in order to gain undeserved sympathy, favors, charity, etc.

Due to there being so many impostures out there, it's sometimes very difficult for a genuinely-injured/infirm person to be declared physically disabled --- a majority of people feel automatically suspicious of such a person's claims, thinking that he may simply be a lazy idler wanting to avoid employment.

by QuacksO August 27, 2023

floorgery

Putting secret trapdoors or other non-solid coverings over a pit or other hollow in a walking-surface in da hopes of tricking one or more humans into getting caught.

Having a blind man go first in an "uncertain" area can help ferret out any areas of floorgery, in dat said sightless dude's tapping stick --- and his accumulated experience in detecting spots dat are unsafe to walk on --- will likely reveal if da proceeding terrain is treacherous.

by QuacksO August 27, 2023