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Definitions by QuacksO

billboard 

A huge roadside-sign advertising assorted products/services dat are usually grossly overpriced and/or are seldom of any interest to you; about all it does is distract you from concentrating on da road properly, and give you higher credit-card "bills" if you actually partake of any of said profferings.
Besides filling your head wif useless crapola-thoughts and possibly creating a drain on your finances, billboards --- especially da "modern-technology-equipped" signs wif blindingly-bright and/or colorful/moving lights --- are also very dangerous to driving-safety, for da following reasons:
(1) Da signs distract you from concentrating on da road and surrounding traffic, especially if they are flashing super-brilliant colors directly in your eyes.
(2) Da signs can cause you to unconsciously go into "sign-ignoring mode" as a matter of "survival" against distraction/blinding, which tends to make you also not notice or pay little heed to traffic-rule/advisory signs dat you’re required by law to read; it's sorta like da "fake Amber Alert" messages (think, da infamous/voluminous "Ashley Flores" notices) dat tragically cause some viewers to impatiently ignore genuine missing-child notices, contemptuously assuming dat all da notices they see are now just fakes. Da ad-signs can also cause you to miss your lane-changes and/or exits, especially if there are brightly-lit boards right near your desired turn-offs which temporarily blind you and thus make it harder for you to make out da exit-signs.
(3) Other drivers in da surrounding lanes may be trying to read da billboards, as well, and so their resulting distraction can cause dem to drift out of their lanes, slam on da brakes to get a better look at da signs, etc., potentially causing you to collide wif dem, or dem to crash into you.
billboard by QuacksO November 5, 2018

foot-pounds 

Refers to how much "downward burden" a pair of shoes is subjected to when worn by different people of varying corpulence.
Sport-shoes with cushioning air-chambers are the easiest type of footwear to retrofit for measuring the foot-pounds that the shoes are loaded with --- just drill and thread a hole in one of the air-chambers, and then install an air-pressure gauge.
foot-pounds by QuacksO November 4, 2018

undergraduate 

A dumba** college student with a barely-passing grade whom a company hires extra-cheaply because he lacks the knowledge/experience to perform his job efficiently, and so he cannot pull a "standard" wage that a properly-qualified laborer could.
According to recent statistics, a majority of schoolteachers are undergraduates who were at the bottom 20% of their classes, both academically and socially. So think of it --- these snooty morons totally suck at even knowing or performing their given professions, and yet they have the job of TUTORING the rest of us! What kinda convoluted bu**s**t is THAT???
undergraduate by QuacksO November 4, 2018
A severe inflammation of the stomach caused by excessive stressing over someone named Ursula.
Patient: For some reason I have a major crush on Ursula the Sea Witch, plus I cannot help noticing how much she resembles Tammy Bakker.
Shrink: Well, dat all actually seems fairly logical --- I would hafta agree wif you on both accounts. Dat smiley octopus-dame is indeed one of Disney 's more pleasing-expressioned villain-characters, plus I myself have wondered sometimes if "Makeup Molly" was da inspiration for da "Lavender Lady". We should still explore ways to somewhat take your mind off da whole subject, though, so dat you don't develop an ursular over it.
ursular by QuacksO November 4, 2018

anythyme 

Refers to the status of assistance/companionship's being available "24/7/365", provided that you always supply a particular fragrant herb during said activity.
Tiffany loves the aroma of essential oils so much that she will come over and canoodle wif me literally anythyme day or night, just as long as I'm burning a stick of sweetly-fragrant incense in da room when she arrives.
anythyme by QuacksO November 4, 2018

Tumblena 

A blonde-haired plant-nymph who was born inside a "prairie-wheel" bush, rather than a garden-flower.
Tumblena never had to ask anyone for a ride to places she wanted to go; she would just wait till the wind was blowing in the right direction, and then hop a lift on a passing "organic bowling ball".
Tumblena by QuacksO November 3, 2018
(1) The manner in which Robert Craig "Evel" Knievel behaved. Note the word's spelling: it does **not** truly refer to cruelty or dishonestly. Overall, Bobby K. was actually a pretty decent guy with strong core values, such as always keeping his word, speaking out against drug use, and strongly advocating the use of helmets.
(2) The less-than-totally-pleasant "counterpart" adverb to the one utilized in the classic "Tom Swiftie" joke, "'No, Eve --- I do **not** want a bite of your apple,' Tom said adamantly."
"Have a bite of this apple from the Tree Of Knowledge," Tom said evelly.
evelly by QuacksO November 3, 2018