hide the potato

So, hide the potato (HTP) is a popular game in Florida (especially South Florida) where you get as big a potato possible and shove it up your butt. Some brave souls even try two!

Today, on my agenda, was a trip to Publix, in order to find the best, the biggest, and juiciest potato in order to shove up my rear for absolute pure ecstasy. Ahhhh! Oooh! Soooo fulfilling! Yep, I’m going straight to Hell. It happens. I’ve just got to hide the potato.

by Purplenado March 7, 2023

BORGulance

BORGulance is an ambulance utilized to medically transport students that have consumed WAY TOO much BORG.

28 ambulances, mmhhh, BORGulances, carried away intoxicated students at the Blarney Blowout. Thoughts and prayers are requested for these poor, unfortunate students.

by Purplenado March 7, 2023

sass bark

A sass bark is when your dog is barking, usually at something stupid, and you tell them to stop and, then, they give you one, final, low bark, to get in that last sass bark.

My dog is a little brat as she gave me a sass bark after I yelled at her to stop barking at the leaves blowing in the wind.

by Purplenado March 7, 2023

Oh, yeah, I'm bringing you to Disney World

Oh, yeah, I'm bringing you to Disney World is, really, at the heart of it, the unfulfilled promise of an adult, usually parental figure, to bring the child somewhere exciting or new or fun, but, they never, ever, do it. Basically, narcissistic parenting.

Oh, yeah, I'm bringing you to Disney World, little Danny Boy. Definitely, we are going this summer. Tell all your little friends at school about it.

by Purplenado March 6, 2023

Sweet Bob

Sweet Bob is the sweetest man you will ever know. He is made of Blue Raspberry Hubba Bubba, Charms Super Blow Pops, pink cotton candy, fluff, and chocolate covered cherries.

Sweet Bob is SO sweet I want to gobble him up! Yummy!

by Purplenado March 6, 2023

AOFC

So, AOFC stand for Atlantic Ocean Fucking Club. This is a secret society based in Hollywood (Hollyweird), FL. It is invite only. The meeting location is NEVER disclosed. Plenty of debauchery goes on behind closed doors. It’s almost like the movie “Eyes Wide Shut.”

OMG! I am the luckiest girl in the world as I snagged an invite to the AOFC!

by Purplenado March 10, 2023

Sugar Plum Cock

So, a Sugar Plum Cock (SPC) is a cock, around the holiday season, that engages in anal intercourse and, when disengaging (withdrawing) pulls out a “plum.” The “plum” is actually a turd.

Oh! On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, one Sugar Plum Cock.

by Purplenado March 7, 2023