Mortechant's definitions

Deforestation

When you're masturwaiting and you unconsciously play with your pubes to the point that they are removed, generally only in a certain area.

"Ooh, I like the scenery tonight, baby. Have you been manscaping exotically for me?"
"Just a bit of deforestation, love. I know how you enjoy things kinky."

by Mortechant June 29, 2015

Urbanite Dick

Someone who refers more frequently to Urban Dictionary than to the Standard Oxford Dictionary for their definitions.

"Stop being an Urbanite Dick! That word means something far less inappropriate!"

by Mortechant May 30, 2015

Shucking

The sound made from wet love-making.

*Moist squelching sounds*
"Mmm, yeah, you like me shucking you, don't you, baby?"
"God, yes! Don't stop, don't stop, don't stoppppppppp! Mmmhmmmmhmmmm..."

by Mortechant July 6, 2015

Quoop

When you're having vaginal sex with a woman while submerged (partially or completely), in a body of water and air bubbles are squeezed out of her nether regions.

*frenetic splashing sounds* "Hey! Air bubbles?!? That was a quoop. You quooped!"

by Mortechant June 14, 2015

Smiley

When someone walks up to you pretending to be a friend and knees you in the groin as hard as they can.

"Can you believe Alison? She gave me the worst smiley today. I'm still walking funny."
"Don't be silly. That was just a little love tap."

by Mortechant July 6, 2015

Snake race

When your mates come over to watch and debate the finer points of porn and, inevitably, become aroused.

"It's always a snake race at my place with the lads."

by Mortechant March 6, 2015

Joshing

Making a simple, inoffensive joke that nevertheless somehow hurts a friend's feelings.

"That was a low, back-handed blow there, mate."
"I was just joshing you. Don't take it to heart."

by Mortechant March 7, 2015