38 definitions by Mike109999

Similar to False Hustle in its blatant vomit inducing cosplay, False Leadership is typically seen in the work place, specifically in company meetings, emails with many people cc'd, or over-thanking people to their superiors.

The main goal is to portray one's self as a great leader, specifically in the eyes of their bosses.

It elicits rage from people who witness it on a consistent basis.
*In a Weekly Team Meeting*

Carly: I had Neil run some data tests for me, and then had Ignacio compare them to the other dates.

Neil: Ugh, false leadership. My JOB is to run data tests, I did them on my own accord. We have not spoken in 2 weeks.

Carly: *Looking at her boss Mark* Neil, that work really helped the team alot and helped me with my presentation. Thank you.

Neil: Kill me now.
by Mike109999 February 12, 2022
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When someone at work has an artificial and unfair advantage over their peers, due to their parents or family being connected. This helps them get jobs, get introduced to people, invited to social events, etc...
Alex: John is really doing well at his career, he just got a killer job.

Mike: Oh, his dad got him that job, donated $25k also to the company's charity.

Alex: Ah, White Collar Steroids. I should have known. John is an idiot.
by Mike109999 August 1, 2020
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A close friend to bounce professional ideas & problems off of. They are not your mentors, family members or investors, so this distance allows them to give you sound advice, while keeping a tone of friendship, trust and objectivity.
Dan: Ugh, I just got off an investors call, Chris cited his mentor 3 times.

Alde: Fuck I hate that pretentious shit. I never mention my White Collar Brosef, that shit is personal.

Dan: Seriously Unc, let's get some shawarma.
by Mike109999 August 16, 2022
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Having a 20-30 minute vent session with a friend where you unload and perge all of your internal crap. You feel like a weight is lifted from you, figuratively and literally.

When you are done, you literally are lighter, more focused, and less full of emotional shit.
Lauren: Vicky, thanks so much for the emotional colonic yesterday, you're a great friend.

Victoria: No problem, life clogs us all up at some point.

Lauren: Ya, I just hadn't talked about hooking up with the guys from B2K and I just HAD to tell someone.
by Mike109999 August 30, 2018
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The emotional state of a combination of anger, confusion, and disgust, derived from a harmless situation that you made worse by being irrationally dramatic.
Almo: GIRL, thanks for meeting me for emergency brunch. I ran into my ex at the Warriors game last night! I am pretty sure he is dating our Uber driver from the last time we ordered sushi together, and he was wearing the shirt I got him at the Avril Lavigne concert.

ELdee: Girl, you need to leave The Jada Aisle. Your ex is from high school, Uber did not exist then. Also, you are allergic to fish and nobody wears Avril Lavigne stuff. Let's get you some mimosas and an emotional colonic, stat.

Almo: *Takes a Deep Breath*, thanks for taking me out of The Jada Aisle. I didn't even like him, he was a Hard Unsubscribe For Me.

ELdee: We all have our moments.
by Mike109999 April 28, 2022
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When someone says something so dumb, the entire conversation is killed and you need to move on immediately.

It is the talking equivalent of aggressively holding down the off button on your computer to just shut it down, without regard for open documents or what you were doing.
*At a Denny's*

Milo: Is your coffee fair trade and organically sourced.

Server: Ok, We're Done Here.
by Mike109999 April 23, 2022
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The type of expression that does not sound very good in everyday speak, but works very well and makes more sense in a boardroom with the corporate crowd.
Rick: Did you really ask me if I'm emotionally in the red or black today? That's so dumb.

Kyle: Ya but that line Smells So Good In A Boardroom. Suits love it.

Rick: Ya, I could see that.
by Mike109999 March 14, 2022
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