39 definitions by Mike109999

An idea that may seem worthy of changing your life for, in the name of chasing your dreams and YOLO, but objectively, it is a fucking bad idea.

The only reason to do it would be for YOLO, despite it being dumb, not calculated, and have lasting negative effects.

Like a face tattoo, for example.
Skip: I really want to leave my super successful company, where I make lots of money, have an amazing partner, have zero debt, and have tons of fortune 500 clients. I want to make weed cookies. This is my calling, this is my dream.

Shay: Skip, you cant do it now, everyone is flooding the weed market, and your company is rock solid. Now is NOT the time to leave.

Skip: I think this is my destiny, like do I want to wake up everyday and be a marketing guy?!?

Shay: Now is NOT the time for false YOLO. Just eat weed cookies at work. You own your office, fam. Best of both worlds.
by Mike109999 February 9, 2022
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When someone at work has an artificial and unfair advantage over their peers, due to their parents or family being connected. This helps them get jobs, get introduced to people, invited to social events, etc...
Alex: John is really doing well at his career, he just got a killer job.

Mike: Oh, his dad got him that job, donated $25k also to the company's charity.

Alex: Ah, White Collar Steroids. I should have known. John is an idiot.
by Mike109999 August 1, 2020
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When a struggling sports team fires their coach, and a new coach comes in and the team initially does really well.

Everyone is all smiles, the new coach tries new things, is fun and upbeat, and seemingly *changes the culture* so the team performs really well.....until they don't.

The few good games are due to excitement, and once the substitute teacher has to be a real teacher, fails spectacularly because he actually has to teach.
Boris: Oh fuck, you see how the new coach has turned this team around. I told you the old guy sucked.

Edgar: Meh, it is the Substitute Teacher Effect, come back to me in 3 months. Team is just playing well. New guy can't coach.

3 months later.....

Edgar: Team sucks, and coach looks really constipated.

Boris: Ya, you were right. Substitute Teacher Effect wins again.
by Mike109999 March 21, 2022
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When you see something and instantly know you want to have nothing to do it. The figurative version of projectile vomiting on command.

Typically seen in pet peeve situations, or when someone in a group mentions they want to order Indian Food.
Keanen: Haha oh Fuck, look at Coach's presser, he was hamming it up today. Talking wrestling. He really keeps the boys loose, eh.

Demmers: Ugh, That's a Hard Unsubscribe For Me.
by Mike109999 February 17, 2022
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It is said with a rhetorical tone to overstate its emphasis, but also in total seriousness because the situation calls for a cold, figurative slap in the face.

If an eye roll was a vocal expression and not a sigh, this would be it.
Eldee: Ok, so happy hour at BP is from 3-6, wings, mini pizzas, and ceasers. I made a reso for right in front of the big screen, the fights start at 7.

Colleen: There's a really cutesy and ironic place on the Lower East Side that has fantastic arugula salad, and the rosee comes in fair trade mason jars!

Eldee: Guys, What Are We Doing Here?!
by Mike109999 February 17, 2022
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When something or someone is not *technically* Jewish, but might as well be due to LITERALLY everything about them, including looks and mannerisms.

Like delis, George Costanza, and most hot moms under 5'8, for example.
Milo: Hey you want to do brunch this Saturday, I am macking hard on this new chick, Veronica, she will be there with friends.

Noah: Isn't she Jewish, does she go out Saturday?

Milo: Nah, she is just kosher style, she looks Jewish because she dyes her hair red, is 5'2, and still talks about her slutty semester abroad in 2004.

Noah: Cool, let's get some bacon, brosef.
by Mike109999 January 27, 2022
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Acronym for Permission To Sound Like A Douche.

When in conversation and the next talking points are in context and push the dialogue forward, but you will sound like a douche.

You emotionally prepare people by asking permission to sound like a douche, mostly to soften the landing of said douchiness.
PMF: Ya, I just think teams overcharging for ticket prices is absurd.


PMF: Please...

JBT: You know Paul, what people don't understand, is that sports is a business.
by Mike109999 December 29, 2022
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