Mike109999's definitions
Your tier 1 friends who are always there for you, and who emotionally attend every moment of your life, just like season ticket holders attend every game for their cherished sports team.
GS: Gurl, when are you going to announce your new job?
PT: Gotta tell my Emotional Season Ticket Holders first before we briefcase chuckle about moving to the cold. This good news is like a reward for all my Sports PTSD I put them through.
PT: Gotta tell my Emotional Season Ticket Holders first before we briefcase chuckle about moving to the cold. This good news is like a reward for all my Sports PTSD I put them through.
by Mike109999 September 22, 2025
Get the Emotional Season Ticket Holder mug.When you have PTSD from a sporting event, play or team. It elicits the same anxiety, shortness of breath, nightmares, guilt, shame, and aggressive behaviour as traditional PTSD, and has the same traumatizing effect.
Dana: Hey Gurl, what are we going to get for our Super Bowl party, wings and pizza again?
Angie: Hey Gurl, I dont think we will make it this year, Brett's Sports PTSD is acting up again, he saw a highlight of the Hawks Patriots Super Bowl again. He hasnt left his room in 4 days.
Dana: Gurl, I hear you. Paul gets the same way when seeing the Joe Carter homerun. Let's just get sushi and update our Bumble accounts.
Angie: Hey Gurl, I dont think we will make it this year, Brett's Sports PTSD is acting up again, he saw a highlight of the Hawks Patriots Super Bowl again. He hasnt left his room in 4 days.
Dana: Gurl, I hear you. Paul gets the same way when seeing the Joe Carter homerun. Let's just get sushi and update our Bumble accounts.
by Mike109999 September 6, 2022
Get the Sports PTSD mug.It is similar to the White Collar Friend Zone in that you have emotionally gaslit yourself, but this time you have brought yourself to cope with your team’s lack of success through fabricated moral victories and self-fulfilling prophecies.
Coley: Guys, I don't really care my favourite hockey team since birth lost 2 straight cup finals, I really enjoyed the togetherness at the Molson Oilers Experience and being with friends to watch every game. It really IS about the journey, not the destination.
KB: Fuck Coley, you are in the Fandom Friend Zone, like the time you said you valued the unique stories of all the 18th century antiques you bought at garage sale when you were trying to sleep with that chick.
You should have sports PTSD from you AND your team not being able to put it home, **Foreskin Chuckle**.
Coley: Gosh, you may be right, but I really enjoyed the $26 Aeporol Spritz activation during the 2nd Round.
KB: Ok, We're Done Here.
KB: Fuck Coley, you are in the Fandom Friend Zone, like the time you said you valued the unique stories of all the 18th century antiques you bought at garage sale when you were trying to sleep with that chick.
You should have sports PTSD from you AND your team not being able to put it home, **Foreskin Chuckle**.
Coley: Gosh, you may be right, but I really enjoyed the $26 Aeporol Spritz activation during the 2nd Round.
KB: Ok, We're Done Here.
by Mike109999 November 12, 2025
Get the Fandom Friend Zone mug.Applies to sports bars that are always right near capacity, but you could always find a seat.
These unicorn bars are the best of both worlds for fans: A great atmosphere AND people know they could still get in without reservations.
These unicorn bars are the best of both worlds for fans: A great atmosphere AND people know they could still get in without reservations.
Melissa: Where we watching the game tonight, Fam?
Jeff: Ugh, I totally forgot to make a reso, I have been busy all week.
Melissa: Ok, tip-off is in one hour, let's go to 99 Wings, they are an 85% Rule place.
Jeff: So good, and they have the best cajun rub wings.
Jeff: Ugh, I totally forgot to make a reso, I have been busy all week.
Melissa: Ok, tip-off is in one hour, let's go to 99 Wings, they are an 85% Rule place.
Jeff: So good, and they have the best cajun rub wings.
by Mike109999 August 6, 2022
Get the 85% Rule mug.A sports team that looks very strong from a distance, but the closer and more carefully you look, the more you realize they are not very good, and are in fact, very beatable.
Also applicable to companies.
Also applicable to companies.
Jim: Man, you see how good New York looks, they are going to dominate the playoffs.
Ralph: Nah, they are so SkinnyFat. They are very top heavy, can't win close games, can't manufacture runs, have awful coaching, and they are not good under pressure. They only win blowouts. If you punch them in the face, they quickly wilt.
Jim: I hate SkinnyFat teams, I always bet against those teams, bruh.
Ralph: Nah, they are so SkinnyFat. They are very top heavy, can't win close games, can't manufacture runs, have awful coaching, and they are not good under pressure. They only win blowouts. If you punch them in the face, they quickly wilt.
Jim: I hate SkinnyFat teams, I always bet against those teams, bruh.
by Mike109999 March 18, 2022
Get the SkinnyFat mug.When your life is super easy, whether it be due to White Collar Steroids, or simply, things that are difficult or stressful for others are given to you.
Lance: Man, I cant even get an INTERVIEW for this role and I have all the credentials, how the heck did Keith get the job, he is an actual moron.
Spencer: Keegan's dad is a big deal at the firm, set the whole thing up. His life is an empty net goal.
Lance: Man, I wish MY life was an empty net goal, who the fuck wants to pay a mortgage every month.
Spencer: Ya, the worst is Keith acts like all of this is difficult for him. Like, Brosef, we know your life is an empty net goal and you don't have to worry about your car payments.
Spencer: Keegan's dad is a big deal at the firm, set the whole thing up. His life is an empty net goal.
Lance: Man, I wish MY life was an empty net goal, who the fuck wants to pay a mortgage every month.
Spencer: Ya, the worst is Keith acts like all of this is difficult for him. Like, Brosef, we know your life is an empty net goal and you don't have to worry about your car payments.
by Mike109999 January 31, 2022
Get the Empty Net Goal mug.When you have to force laughter in a business setting, most commonly seen in a meeting or walking by someone in the office.
It is similar to Foreskin Chuckle in its deliberateness.
It is similar to Foreskin Chuckle in its deliberateness.
Emmitt The Intern: Does every meeting start with talking about the weather, the latest on Twitter, and gas prices? Also, nobody said anything funny in that meeting, but I think Thompson ACTUALLY pounded the table 3 times.
Sinclair, The Savvy Office Veteran: Yes, it is imperative to Briefcase Chuckle before every meeting, each and every time someone mentions someone else's hometown, and whenever someone talks about their alma mater's rival.
Emmitt: Ahh, thank you for helping me. I really appreciate you showing me the ropes.
Sinclair: Ya, too bad your coach didn't show your boys the ropes last weekend, eh? That was quite a beating we gave you.
Emmitt: Oh Our QB just couldn't get anything going...OHFU...ohhhhhh I see what you did there.
Sinclair: You're Welcome.
Sinclair, The Savvy Office Veteran: Yes, it is imperative to Briefcase Chuckle before every meeting, each and every time someone mentions someone else's hometown, and whenever someone talks about their alma mater's rival.
Emmitt: Ahh, thank you for helping me. I really appreciate you showing me the ropes.
Sinclair: Ya, too bad your coach didn't show your boys the ropes last weekend, eh? That was quite a beating we gave you.
Emmitt: Oh Our QB just couldn't get anything going...OHFU...ohhhhhh I see what you did there.
Sinclair: You're Welcome.
by Mike109999 November 15, 2022
Get the Briefcase Chuckle mug.