Definitions by Mike109999
The Jada Aisle
The emotional state of a combination of anger, confusion, and disgust, derived from a harmless situation that you made worse by being irrationally dramatic.
Almo: GIRL, thanks for meeting me for emergency brunch. I ran into my ex at the Warriors game last night! I am pretty sure he is dating our Uber driver from the last time we ordered sushi together, and he was wearing the shirt I got him at the Avril Lavigne concert.
ELdee: Girl, you need to leave The Jada Aisle. Your ex is from high school, Uber did not exist then. Also, you are allergic to fish and nobody wears Avril Lavigne stuff. Let's get you some mimosas and an emotional colonic, stat.
Almo: *Takes a Deep Breath*, thanks for taking me out of The Jada Aisle. I didn't even like him, he was a Hard Unsubscribe For Me.
ELdee: We all have our moments.
ELdee: Girl, you need to leave The Jada Aisle. Your ex is from high school, Uber did not exist then. Also, you are allergic to fish and nobody wears Avril Lavigne stuff. Let's get you some mimosas and an emotional colonic, stat.
Almo: *Takes a Deep Breath*, thanks for taking me out of The Jada Aisle. I didn't even like him, he was a Hard Unsubscribe For Me.
ELdee: We all have our moments.
The Jada Aisle by Mike109999 April 28, 2022
Ok, We're Done Here
When someone says something so dumb, the entire conversation is killed and you need to move on immediately.
It is the talking equivalent of aggressively holding down the off button on your computer to just shut it down, without regard for open documents or what you were doing.
It is the talking equivalent of aggressively holding down the off button on your computer to just shut it down, without regard for open documents or what you were doing.
Ok, We're Done Here by Mike109999 April 23, 2022
StayTuned
The business version of 'we are waiting to see what happens during the next few steps before we make any moves or decisions'.
It is a very descriptive term, in the sense it immediately identifies the user as a douche.
It is a very descriptive term, in the sense it immediately identifies the user as a douche.
Paul: Could you ask Peter if he could get us tickets to the game tonight.
Marion: Good call, I just sent him a text. StayTuned.
Paul: Fucking hell, forget it.
Marion: Good call, I just sent him a text. StayTuned.
Paul: Fucking hell, forget it.
StayTuned by Mike109999 April 15, 2022
Empty Calories
A quarterback who puts up a lot of seemingly impressive stats, but rarely wins games, rendering his stats useless in the grand scheme of things.
Also applicable for stats put up when the team is down or up by a lot. AKA, not when a game is being determined.
Also applicable for stats put up when the team is down or up by a lot. AKA, not when a game is being determined.
Jay: I am so pumped for my team's new QB, we are going to air it out all season long.
Joel: Hmm, I don't know. All I see is a bunch of empty calories, he may be useless when it counts.
Jay: Ugh, he never wins big games, you are so right.
Joel: Hmm, I don't know. All I see is a bunch of empty calories, he may be useless when it counts.
Jay: Ugh, he never wins big games, you are so right.
Empty Calories by Mike109999 March 21, 2022
Substitute Teacher Effect
When a struggling sports team fires their coach, and a new coach comes in and the team initially does really well.
Everyone is all smiles, the new coach tries new things, is fun and upbeat, and seemingly *changes the culture* so the team performs really well.....until they don't.
The few good games are due to excitement, and once the substitute teacher has to be a real teacher, fails spectacularly because he actually has to teach.
Everyone is all smiles, the new coach tries new things, is fun and upbeat, and seemingly *changes the culture* so the team performs really well.....until they don't.
The few good games are due to excitement, and once the substitute teacher has to be a real teacher, fails spectacularly because he actually has to teach.
Boris: Oh fuck, you see how the new coach has turned this team around. I told you the old guy sucked.
Edgar: Meh, it is the Substitute Teacher Effect, come back to me in 3 months. Team is just playing well. New guy can't coach.
3 months later.....
Edgar: Team sucks, and coach looks really constipated.
Boris: Ya, you were right. Substitute Teacher Effect wins again.
Edgar: Meh, it is the Substitute Teacher Effect, come back to me in 3 months. Team is just playing well. New guy can't coach.
3 months later.....
Edgar: Team sucks, and coach looks really constipated.
Boris: Ya, you were right. Substitute Teacher Effect wins again.
Substitute Teacher Effect by Mike109999 March 21, 2022
SkinnyFat
A sports team that looks very strong from a distance, but the closer and more carefully you look, the more you realize they are not very good, and are in fact, very beatable.
Also applicable to companies.
Also applicable to companies.
Jim: Man, you see how good New York looks, they are going to dominate the playoffs.
Ralph: Nah, they are so SkinnyFat. They are very top heavy, can't win close games, can't manufacture runs, have awful coaching, and they are not good under pressure. They only win blowouts. If you punch them in the face, they quickly wilt.
Jim: I hate SkinnyFat teams, I always bet against those teams, bruh.
Ralph: Nah, they are so SkinnyFat. They are very top heavy, can't win close games, can't manufacture runs, have awful coaching, and they are not good under pressure. They only win blowouts. If you punch them in the face, they quickly wilt.
Jim: I hate SkinnyFat teams, I always bet against those teams, bruh.
SkinnyFat by Mike109999 March 18, 2022
Smells So Good In A Boardroom
The type of expression that does not sound very good in everyday speak, but works very well and makes more sense in a boardroom with the corporate crowd.
Rick: Did you really ask me if I'm emotionally in the red or black today? That's so dumb.
Kyle: Ya but that line Smells So Good In A Boardroom. Suits love it.
Rick: Ya, I could see that.
Kyle: Ya but that line Smells So Good In A Boardroom. Suits love it.
Rick: Ya, I could see that.
Smells So Good In A Boardroom by Mike109999 March 13, 2022