Definitions by Marcusmastur
Canadian Disaster
Tying 60 hazelnuts around the tip of your penis, tied to your balls, then tying a moldy orange beneath the bundle, then using the weight of your penis to spring-shoot the hazelnut bundle directly in front of your asscrack like a springboard
Jimmy: "The Canadian Disaster is an experience that you NEED to try."
Dave: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THATTT"
Dave: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THATTT"
Canadian Disaster by Marcusmastur July 8, 2026
Taiwanese Flying Squirrel
Getting a surgery which is able to make the sides of the penis to fold downward (not too far above so it doesnt expose the flesh) and during intercourse it repeatedly folds up and down like the sides of a missile
Aaron: "Dude, I had the CRAZIEST experience last night, I GAVE MARCUS THE TAIWANESE FLYING SQUIRREL!"
Dave: "what the fuck are you talking about"
Dave: "what the fuck are you talking about"
Taiwanese Flying Squirrel by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026
Azerbaijan Gambit
Breakdancing around a "cylindrically shaped object" going up and down and attempting not to have it insert while listening to traditional EDM music
Additionally: Lubricant must be poured all over the floor and "Cylinder"
Additionally: Lubricant must be poured all over the floor and "Cylinder"
Linda: If you want a true challenge, try the Azerbaijan Gambit
James: why am I ALWAYS the one being told these things
James: why am I ALWAYS the one being told these things
Azerbaijan Gambit by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026
Belgian Whistle
Surgically having small spaced out clean holes stabbed through the urethra and then blowing through the penis, which then makes a whistle sound.
Marcus: You've NEVER had true sex until you've done the Belgian Whistle.
James: *texting on his phone* sorry what were you saying
James: *texting on his phone* sorry what were you saying
Belgian Whistle by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026
Ursan Blunder
Doing a backflip dive combo, and then landing penis first in a tub of porcupine needles and a glue/resin mixture, then pulling it out making it spiky
(Ursa comes from the hit roblox game Centaura.)
(Ursa comes from the hit roblox game Centaura.)
Ursan Blunder by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026
Mongolian Catastrophe
Tying a 30kg weight around your balls and using pure concentrated power to swing it around while throat singing with only a bathrobe on, in a temple atop the Mongolian mountains with a view out to the steppes
(Back must be facing the view, and you must be atop a pedestal)
(Back must be facing the view, and you must be atop a pedestal)
Mongolian Catastrophe by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026
Teabagging
Teabagging is a sex act where Partner A fills their mouth up with hot water, Partner B proceeds to crouch on top of them and dip their testicles into their mouth.
Marcus: Me and Jimothy tried Teabagging last night, and hoowee! I let it marinate for a bit
James: i'm not even gonna ask anymore
James: i'm not even gonna ask anymore
Teabagging by Marcusmastur July 7, 2026