Definitions by Lord Zoltar

obasm 

The pleasure that a liberal-leaning journalist gets when writing a fawning story about U.S. Sen. Barack Obama (D-IL). An "obasm" is a story so gushy and so fluffy, bereft of objectivity, that one imagines having to clean up after the writer with a mop and bucket.

"Did you see the obasm the local newspaper had on the front page today? They're not even pretending to be objective anymore."

obasm by Lord Zoltar December 14, 2008

mega culpa 

An apology for a big-time screw-up (from the Latin "mea culpa" for "my fault"). You would not issue a "mega culpa" for eating the last doughnut in the employee lounge, but for offenses such as, but not limited to, robbing a bank, knocking up your sister-in-law, being expelled from school for running an opium den in the boiler room, etc.

"Did you hear Michael Vick's mega culpa after he pleaded guilty to bankrolling that dogfighting operation?"

mega culpa by Lord Zoltar September 3, 2007

Sprechen Sie Dork? 

A response to something stupid, or a friend who doesn't understand what you're saying. Similar to "losersayswhat?" or "asphinctersays what?" or "cockandballs?".

Bill: Could you throw this bucket of gasoline on the fire?
Ted: Sprechen Sie Dork?

Sprechen Sie Dork? by Lord Zoltar December 24, 2005

cockanetics 

Similar to "cockonics," but is the mindset to get you laid rather than the language. Made famous in the book "Cockanetics" by L. Ron Jeremy.

"Brutha, you gots to walk in there knowin' you'll get laid tonight. Think cockanetics, man!"

cockanetics by Lord Zoltar November 23, 2005

cockonics 

1. The language of love, or sweet-talking some sweet young lady into your bed. A takeoff of the word "ebonics" for inner-city speech.

2. The art of whipping out your cock to pick up a woman, satisfied that its sheer length and girth will win her over rather than conversation or spending an assload of money on the theater and an expensive dinner.

"Wow, dude, you picked up seven bizzos in seven days! How do you do it? Do you speak cockonics?"

cockonics by Lord Zoltar November 23, 2005

fizznuck 

A permutation of "fuck" using Snoop's famed "-izzle" language so as not to offend old folks who mind the f-bomb but are down wit' da d-o-double-gizzle in da hizzle, you know what I'm sayin'?

"What, the bitches aren't here at the bar? What the fizznuck, over?"

fizznuck by Lord Zoltar November 23, 2005

bizzlotch 

A bitch, bizzle-atch, bizznatch, etc., who just did something disgusting or is merely disgusting by nature. Coined in Heidelberg, Germany by two U.S. Army soldiers at 5 a.m. after St. Patrick's Day 2002 when a 6'2" black man with a huge-ass dome threw up corned beef, cabbage and 15 screwdrivers in the small hotel's hallway.

(Two drunk soldiers stagger into the hotel room.)

"Hey, bizzlotch, did you puke in the hallway?"

bizzlotch by Lord Zoltar October 9, 2005