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Definitions by Jeffrey Douglas

yellow pages 

1) Big book which has many uses

2) your history coursework after you've "accidently" pissed on it.
1) Uses of the yellow pages;
Finding dominatrixes
Making short/dumpy girls easier to kiss
Destroying your enemies
Fuel for your fire, when you run out of babies
and many, many more

2)
Jack: "OH! SHIT! I just pissed on my History coursework! just look at these yellow pages!"
yellow pages by Jeffrey Douglas November 20, 2006

miss of the season 

1. term used by commentators to describe a footballers sometimes hilarious miss.

2. term used by friends to mock a male who has failed to shag the town bike
John Motson: "Rooney, Giggs and Ronaldo, now surely, Ye - Oh - no! miss of the season. Piss poor shot from Ronaldo

Kev: "As if you didn't bang Sally, she is soo easy!"
Gav: "Yea but i forgot my rhohypnol"
Kev: "Oh, mate, miss of the season!"
Teacher: "Oh, dear, John! John, JOHN! Stop teasing harry because he is fat!"
teasing by Jeffrey Douglas November 19, 2006

mad for it

mad for it is a condition suffered exclusively in the greater manchester region. Becoming mad for it often stems from over-excitement from listening to the happy mondays or stone roses. Being mad for it means something similar to a state of excited anticipation. The after effects of being mad for it are hangovers, a sausage sellotaped to one's neck and a really ugly bird who is the cousin of John Squire. apparantly.
John: "Fuckin' MAD FOR IT!!!"
Liam: "wha' 'bout?"
John: "Don' Kno'!! but fucking TUUUUUUUUUUUNE!"
mad for it by Jeffrey Douglas November 15, 2006

fuckshitfuckshitfuck 

Exclamation. describing state of panic.
fuckshitfuckshitfuck could be used for the following;

Opening a parachute but to no effect.

Realising you did not pay attention to your instructions on your exam paper and forgot to answer BOTH questions.

Putting your hand in your back pocket to pay your tab at a bar to discover you never took your wallet.

Having your johnny burst during private time with the missus.

Looking at the black guy using the urinal next to you, who is incidentally twice your size, with you dressed for a party as a grand wizard of the K.K.K.
Noun. Something that weighs you down. Usually a worry or a sore point you don't share with close friends or orangutangs.

You can also be a burden on someone else when you try and talk about your problems and worries to someone else.
Physical Hang ups, girlfriends, wife (wives) or debt. all of these are burdens.

Hayley: "I'm worried!"
Steve: "Shut up you have so many burdens! Don't become a burden yourself!"
burden by Jeffrey Douglas November 15, 2006
Adj. Poorly co-ordinated. Bumbling ninny.
Blind People

Jack: "Pass the that plate please."
CRASH
Jack: "Oh you clumsy blind twat!"
Clumsy by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006