Jacob Miller 's definitions
Any idiot who works for a package delivery company and leaves large boxes or expensive electronic equipement at a recipients home without getting a signature (on the doorstep or the like), then only to discover that the recipent called to complain that the delivery was never made, when in reality they kept the stuff without paying for it.. hence leaving the FedEx employee with some explaining to do.
"I ordered this new laptop from Gateway and when I got home that Former FedEx Employee left it at my door, what an idiot. I totally called the company and told them I never got it"
by Jacob Miller September 6, 2005

by Jacob Miller May 17, 2006

A male family member of another, more successful Indian hotel owner hired to basically keep an eye on the hotel(s) but has no real grasp of the business nor any real mental capacity to ever become a successful owner in his own right. The Indian version of a loser.
"Habib has been running the hotel for his brother in law for 10 years, but he is such a Raj Patel that his future is not likely to ever amount to more than that."
by Jacob Miller September 13, 2005

A white, American born male hired by an Indian hotel owner as general manager and to act as the "public face" of the property he manages. To be a true Billy Schrank, this person must also consistenty allow himself to get fucked out of promised bonus pay and be easily tricked into performing capital upgrades and maintenance to the property for no additonal money, thus making him a complete loser, a sucker and an individual devoid of his manhood.
"The manager of the La Quinta was nice enough, but I felt sorry for him because he worked so hard for that damn Indian owner for peanuts. Jesus what a friggin' Schrank he was."
by Jacob Miller December 28, 2005

A coolero is a married man whose wife has tricked him into thinking that the child/ren she had birthed while married to him are actually his although they look so unlike him in any way that only a friggin idiot would believe that they are really his. Spawned from Me, Myself and Irene when Jim Carrey's character's wife has three black boys and he never questions the paternity.
by Jacob Miller September 14, 2005

An individual whom follows package delivery services around during the holiday's seeking out opportunities to steal boxes that are left in front of houses by the driver.
"Dude, me and Bob did a little UPStalking yesterday and nabbed a new PC thanks to the dork who left the box at a vacant house."
by Jacob Miller September 6, 2005

The happy feeling experienced by a parent when they are preparing to change what is believed to be a dirty baby diaper, but turns out to be just pee.
"I was not looking forward to changing Frannie's diaper because I thought she crapped only to get a nice surprise when I saw she didn't."
by Jacob Miller September 6, 2005
