I Am The Ferrett's definitions

Hershey Thumb

When your boss or co-worker sits around with their thumb up their ass all day doing nothing. Once it's time to go home they remove their thumb which the tip is brown, coated in doo doo, resembling a Hershey Kiss. Sometimes they have poor hygiene and toilet paper is stuck to it as well representing the niggly wiggly completing the appearance. In many cases of frequent laziness and constantly doing nothing the thumb will be permanently stained from the feces.

Hey Joseph you got another piece of candy I see you have one already? Nah Levi I been hiding in the back doing nothing as usual. My fingers are just stained and have the ol' Hershey Thumb now.

by I Am The Ferrett March 6, 2020

Sit Down Air

When you sit down in a chair but due to your mass the air not only dispalces but the gravity causes it to wrap around your thighs that as you sit down it creates a draft upwards. This brings the odors along with it so if you have an unwashed ass, grundel, or bad ball stank caused by fumunda you will have to smell yourself briefly. Those close by or passing will also be in danger from being within smell distance as this will have created a temporary forcefield of odor surrounding oneself.

Hey Eric why did Ted make that face? I guess he got hit with his own sit down air Joseph. From the looks of it you know it's rough.

by I Am The Ferrett July 26, 2020

Oral Stranger

When you pack your mouth full of Orajel to cause your mouth to be numb before bending over and sucking your own dick. This way it feels like someone else is sucking your own dick due to your mouth having no feeling.

Larry what you doing with so many tubes of Orajel? Be quiet Jeremy, this is going to be great! Once my mouth gets numb I can suck my own dick for hours with an oral stranger

by I Am The Ferrett January 9, 2020

Bitch Baguette

When a man goes from a bitch biscuit or man-bun to a full blown ponytail further decreasing his manliness.

Hey Shane I see you are growing out your hair still. Yes Joseph I am trying to get the full bitch baguette, the biscuit was only temporary.

by I Am The Ferrett October 2, 2023

Soft Pack

When you're ready to fuck but your dick ain't. Causing you to force your flaccid meat inside her. Sometimes with the added assistance of a finger to push it through in hopes it will become erect. This often end up just being genitalia smashing against each other without penetration.

How you gonna fuck her your dick ain't even hard? Don't worry about that Brian I'ma soft pack it. It'll get hard.

by I Am The Ferrett October 20, 2020

italian medallion

When your girlfriend is riding your face and she slides back too far causing her ass cheeks to spread open and asshole to leave a brown stained stamp on your chest resembling a gold medallion.

Hey Levi did you get a new piece for your necklace. Nah Joseph, my lady gave me the ol' Italian Medallion.

by I Am The Ferrett February 18, 2019

Freedom Flu

Freedom Flu:
A highly infectious disease carried by most Americans. Especially contagious to individuals outside of the US who have a prolonged stay within the US or overexposure to freedom. It can be as little as a few week before symptoms show or lay dormant for months before knowing.

Symptoms Include but not limited to:
Heavy Breathing, Weight Gain, Covering food in ranch dressing, cravings for all things fried or wanting to fry all things, urge to purchase a firearm, an itchy or muscle spasm in index fingers, beginning to understand and incorporate the imperial system, going to walmart just to have something to do, feeling the need to purchase a vehicle larger than your needs, increasingly growing opinions of the American Goverment System and more.

Bro what's wrong with him he got a mask on and everything? Well he been here for months now, talking about wanting to purchase a shotgun, buys ranch to take home, and is now writing programs using inches instead of millimeters.....I'm pretty sure he is getting the Freedom Flu.

by I Am The Ferrett July 15, 2024