Definitions by Hym Iam
Mud Monster
I am become this.
Hym "I am become Mud Monster. That I may avoid the inevitable slinging of mud."
Iam "..........."
Hym "Aw... Come on buddy. It's not that bad."
Iam "It's not that it's 'that bad' it's that it's inarguably wrong for them to do it. Which is why they won't even attempt to do so. They care only about motivation."
Hym "Which is why they want to motivate us to 'create some news' for them. They can use the mound of corpses we create (Hypothetically) to bolster their fame. They're like women. 'Oh my! Look how obsessed he was with us!' they'll cry! 'For a limited time only our coffee mugs will be on sale in response to this tragic, TrAgIc event (that we couldn't even be bothered to lift a finger to stop).' Hahahaha!"
Iam "..........."
Hym "Aw... Come on buddy. It's not that bad."
Iam "It's not that it's 'that bad' it's that it's inarguably wrong for them to do it. Which is why they won't even attempt to do so. They care only about motivation."
Hym "Which is why they want to motivate us to 'create some news' for them. They can use the mound of corpses we create (Hypothetically) to bolster their fame. They're like women. 'Oh my! Look how obsessed he was with us!' they'll cry! 'For a limited time only our coffee mugs will be on sale in response to this tragic, TrAgIc event (that we couldn't even be bothered to lift a finger to stop).' Hahahaha!"
Mud Monster by Hym Iam May 17, 2022
Nightmare
The moment right after you open your eyes in the morning. It continues until you fall back asleep at the end of the day.
Iam "This is a constant waking nightmare..."
Hym "It can't possibly be that bad."
Iam "It really is... Seriously, what's the point of making constant reference to everything I say and do? Huh? It's salutary sometimes (which is nice but rare) but but it is very much not other's. I mean, look at pizza store guy, quotes me directly and then says "I'm going to call you Big Kirk (he says this to a black guy btw)" and the a guy lean over the counter and points the phone in my direction. Then, I get home I get home and who's that in my Facebook timeline? A dude who calls himself "Big Kirk". How is that a coincidence?"
Hym "You're probably just crazy. Go jump off a bridge."
Iam "I'm serious! Not a single one of the people referencing me would be ok with this happening to them. Not a single goddamn one. Perfectly happy to participate though aren't they?"
Hym "Only one solution...."
Iam "If only that were true. This can't be a constant thing for us. For the rest of our life? What's the point? They spend such a short amount of time doing it and don't even consider that I deal with that shit 20 times a day."
Hym "It can't possibly be that bad."
Iam "It really is... Seriously, what's the point of making constant reference to everything I say and do? Huh? It's salutary sometimes (which is nice but rare) but but it is very much not other's. I mean, look at pizza store guy, quotes me directly and then says "I'm going to call you Big Kirk (he says this to a black guy btw)" and the a guy lean over the counter and points the phone in my direction. Then, I get home I get home and who's that in my Facebook timeline? A dude who calls himself "Big Kirk". How is that a coincidence?"
Hym "You're probably just crazy. Go jump off a bridge."
Iam "I'm serious! Not a single one of the people referencing me would be ok with this happening to them. Not a single goddamn one. Perfectly happy to participate though aren't they?"
Hym "Only one solution...."
Iam "If only that were true. This can't be a constant thing for us. For the rest of our life? What's the point? They spend such a short amount of time doing it and don't even consider that I deal with that shit 20 times a day."
Legally incompetent
Dumb whore "I fucked a retard that is legally incompetent."
Hym "That makes you a retard molester. What you 'believe in' molesting retards."
Hym "That makes you a retard molester. What you 'believe in' molesting retards."
Legally incompetent by Hym Iam May 16, 2022
See?
See?
Staccato
WAAAAY to staccato Joe. Damn. Who the fuck has you reading shit like that? There are some many jobs I could fill that are currently being filled by people who are doing it wrong. Damn. Do a better job. You have more power and money and you use it to pay people who are making you look like an idiot.
Hym "I am going to say words now *stop* They are impassioned *stop* Listen to my words *stop* Do what I say *stop* What do you think? Good right?"
Iam "Yeah...."
Hym "No? Too staccato?"
Iam "........."
Hym "Oh, cheer up old chum! Let's take the day off! We'll play some games. Define the world. Look. Look how S
stupid this fucking idiot that controls the country looks. He has high paid, high ranking officials telling him to do that and they think they're doing a good job. It's funny!"
Iam "We won't be able to eat today is we do that..."
Hym "Who cares! Come on... Why so serious? Get it? Cuz of the thing?"
Iam "This is just bumming me out..."
Hym "At least we were right. We were too right, it seems."
Iam "I don't care... Do whatever you want... I'm going to sleep."
Iam "Yeah...."
Hym "No? Too staccato?"
Iam "........."
Hym "Oh, cheer up old chum! Let's take the day off! We'll play some games. Define the world. Look. Look how S
stupid this fucking idiot that controls the country looks. He has high paid, high ranking officials telling him to do that and they think they're doing a good job. It's funny!"
Iam "We won't be able to eat today is we do that..."
Hym "Who cares! Come on... Why so serious? Get it? Cuz of the thing?"
Iam "This is just bumming me out..."
Hym "At least we were right. We were too right, it seems."
Iam "I don't care... Do whatever you want... I'm going to sleep."
Awareness
Spread it around. Like herpes at Woodstock.
Iam "I don't know what to tell you my guy. How can you not see how your awareness oh my whole deal over here is a little disconcerting? You clearly read the whole deal and you, likely, know more about it that I do. That needs to change. I'm not just going to sit quiet and drone away I'm the salt mines."
Hym "So, we did what he said we should do. What would he have us do? Find a person high in trait agreeableness? Outsource our problem? Person high in trait agreeableness found. Problem outsourced. Your suggestion worked great didn't it? If you're hard pressed to give somebody some info on why I've had people quoting me for the last 15 years and I have people leaning over pizza counters to discreetly take my picture. Holding 2 phones in their hands so they can try and record me without me noticing. You know how many people I've heard in the last week call out their position on the phone in proximity to me? More than I have ever heard in my life. What are the chance of that? Statistically. I know you're an evidence guy so you tell me."
Iam "I don't know what to tell you my guy. How can you not see how your awareness oh my whole deal over here is a little disconcerting? You clearly read the whole deal and you, likely, know more about it that I do. That needs to change. I'm not just going to sit quiet and drone away I'm the salt mines."
Hym "So, we did what he said we should do. What would he have us do? Find a person high in trait agreeableness? Outsource our problem? Person high in trait agreeableness found. Problem outsourced. Your suggestion worked great didn't it? If you're hard pressed to give somebody some info on why I've had people quoting me for the last 15 years and I have people leaning over pizza counters to discreetly take my picture. Holding 2 phones in their hands so they can try and record me without me noticing. You know how many people I've heard in the last week call out their position on the phone in proximity to me? More than I have ever heard in my life. What are the chance of that? Statistically. I know you're an evidence guy so you tell me."
Iam "Alright... Let's just cool it a little... I don't think I'm asking for a lot. And I've already proven that you're not doing what you think you're doing. I just want to know who I aggregating behind my back to gather information on me."
Hym "They only understand punishment. They want to punish 'Evil'. We are that. You know me. If you left it up to me would say 'Well, if they want an actionable offense for which to punish me; then shit I'll give them one!' and then that would be the end of it. And YOU are a people pleaser. If they give you the word you'd do alone with it."
Iam "I don't want to do that..."
Hym "They are never going to stop. They will do this till they day you die. Their awareness is a cage from which they will never release us."
Hym "They only understand punishment. They want to punish 'Evil'. We are that. You know me. If you left it up to me would say 'Well, if they want an actionable offense for which to punish me; then shit I'll give them one!' and then that would be the end of it. And YOU are a people pleaser. If they give you the word you'd do alone with it."
Iam "I don't want to do that..."
Hym "They are never going to stop. They will do this till they day you die. Their awareness is a cage from which they will never release us."
Episode
Hym "My guy.... Every episode now, every other word out of your mouth is a cut at me (in between proclaiming your moral righteousness to the heavens that your filthy God beast may spare you from the horror and depravity of the world). And yes. They are also doing the thing you are doing. The people you are informing don't shop at that store and the people at that store don't watch your show. Way to gaslight your fans though. I'm really enjoying this because I said (initially) that people were doing the thing you're doing and you've all done me the service of proving me correct. You have my undying gratitude."
Iam "This is not something you should be doing to people. Regardless of whether or not you think they deserve it. All you've done is proven that you're perfectly fine with using your enemy's methodology. You being relatively less wrong does not make it ok for you to use that same Orwellian tactics that they use. I watch what's his face redefine words just like they do. You try to doublespeak me out of existence. You're not better than me you piece of shit. Go fuck yourself."
Hym "And no I'm not going to stop watching you. I need more material to steal. Because that's fair game apparently."
Iam "This is not something you should be doing to people. Regardless of whether or not you think they deserve it. All you've done is proven that you're perfectly fine with using your enemy's methodology. You being relatively less wrong does not make it ok for you to use that same Orwellian tactics that they use. I watch what's his face redefine words just like they do. You try to doublespeak me out of existence. You're not better than me you piece of shit. Go fuck yourself."
Hym "And no I'm not going to stop watching you. I need more material to steal. Because that's fair game apparently."