Skip to main content

Hifalutin!'s definitions

Hunkerdown

Mephistopholes remained in his hunkerdown for the rest of the pandemic, emerging only for gingerale, The Wall Street Journal and smoke.

Refusing to go to ground in a hunkerdown, brave Bettina kept her janitorial job at Lincoln Center--which was much easier now that all performances were remote. "My, my," she said later in an oral history of The Covid Time. "Fat cats didn't know if they were coming or going--if I paid 250 a ticket, I'd sure show up for the symphony."
by Hifalutin! February 9, 2022
mugGet the Hunkerdownmug.

Harumphsquad

Those who consider themselves the arbiters of all things cultural.
“Titanic!” drones NancyLee. “My grandmaw thought it was sweet, but she was weaned on MTV. Today, we consider the memes. ..”
“Enough from the harumphsquad,” objects Gabriel. “Your grandmaw liked her pickles sour, nothing wrong with that.”

Andy and Mandy dive under the couch and power down their Grand Theft Auto when greybeard mom and pop come in: watch out, it’s the harumphsquad!
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
mugGet the Harumphsquadmug.

Livingwurst

Cheap grub when the household economy goes south.
Panda lost his job, then his apartment, and resigned himself to mama’s den foldout, the smell of her foo young and her Sean Hannity addiction, bravely stocking a minifridge full of nothing but Coors Light and livingwurst from the Polish deli in Yonkers.

“I actually don’t mind livingwurst,” said Tommy, firing up the Weber on his fire escape. “To me, it’s as tasty as the Wagyu I used to love, at a tenth of the cost. I don’t have to do Noom, either, as food of that texture is naturally self-limiting.”
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
mugGet the Livingwurstmug.

Maskmuffle

When the spoken word cannot be heard because of the mouth’s covering with some impervious fabric.
“I’m sorry you had to wait on that frigid corner,” I told Tobee again when we were home in our warm drop seats. “I said East Second street, you heard East Seventh. It was a maskmuffle.”
“If you invoke the maskmuffle excuse one more time,” Tobee said, “I will pour this mulled cider on your wig!”

Sweetums-Angelica didn’t know if her dear old mother ignored her when she directed her to put the cow’s milk in the SubZero, or if it was just another case of mask muffle.
by Hifalutin! February 5, 2022
mugGet the Maskmufflemug.

Torture bed

Where you sleep when you have no other options.
By the time Willow decided to attend her stepmother’s remarriage to Joe-the-Plumber, all the motels in Provincetown had been booked, so she spent the pre-nuptials night on a frenemy’s pullout torture bed and ruined her party back.

“Silas,” says Gal, “I seriously want to stay the weekend and help curate your 3,000-piece Educa Amsterdam puzzle, but the prospect of winding up gagging in your torture bed makes me honestly say I must beg off.”
“I know it’s not the torture bed but the Axe,” says Silas. “It’s always been the Axe.”
by Hifalutin! February 7, 2022
mugGet the Torture bedmug.

mascarification

When it comes to mascara, bigger is best.
“I can still see,” Abra.K.Dabra complained, their eyes atwinkle. “Pass me over the Vegan Volume—stepping out to Club Bahia tonight. I need mascarification – I’d rather be a blind girl, as Etta James had it."
"That was a century ago, said Fifi. "Nude eyes are the thing now."

“I saw Beatrice at Turandot but I didn’t recognize her,” said Extra Ernie. “It looked like two tarantulas had landed on a marshmallow. Then I knew her from her knobby knees and flat chest and remembered how deep she was into mascarification.”
by Hifalutin! March 8, 2022
mugGet the mascarificationmug.

Pretty masks make you sick!

Caution from one citizen to another regarding the insufficient protective qualities of cloth masking.
"Pretty masks make you sick!" said Henry as his ladyfriend Wendy came around the corner, showing off her new daisy-printed hand-sewn cotton mask. "N-95s all the way, dude!"
by Hifalutin! January 13, 2022
mugGet the Pretty masks make you sick!mug.

Share this definition