Head Office Space's definitions

Seatnab

Throwing down something that you’re wearing to hold a seat for yourself or for someone else.

Getting to the movie early, he seatnabbed with a hat, belt and tie for his three friends who were running late.

by Head Office Space May 16, 2019

Crackin’

Having to go to the bathroom really badly.

Uncle: why you eating so much ice cream; you’re lactose intolerant

Samara: I loves the taste but I know I will be crackin’ on the toilet

by Head Office Space August 5, 2022

Phoneghost

A person who dials into random conference calls and makes anonymous comments or noises.

When all of the sudden someone eerily said “Frank & Beans Knows Better” we knew there was a phoneghost on the call.

by Head Office Space May 15, 2019

worktool

The one person you rely on to do all the admin crap in the office

She didn’t attempt to make copies until she knew that the worktool had loaded it with paper.

by Head Office Space May 17, 2019

officejelly

Being jealous over someone at the office for having something that functions as expected.

The officejelly got to her and so she replaced her broken stapler for the Swingline without her cube mate knowing about it.

by Head Office Space May 14, 2019

Workshun

When co-workers won’t talk to you because they think you will get them in trouble with their managers. Mainly enforced due to a decrease in productivity that you are causing.

Brian: today is 80’s trivia, what was the boss’ name on WKRP in Cincinnati?
Alina-Sharon: crickets
Brian: how is it that ketchup was considered a vegetable under Reagan?
Alina-Sharon: crickets
Brian: damn I’m being Workshunned!

by Head Office Space January 30, 2020

meat-sweats

Detoxing from being on a vegetarian diet for too long.

Spent 4 weeks with my Hindi buddy in India then came home to work out the meat-sweats. Having only veggies will fuck your fat American ass up.

by Head Office Space June 6, 2019