The stale finger, dick, body crust your find in between the keys on a keyboard.
Bobby: Hello, IT Support! Yeah, apologies for all of the Keyboard Crust. I've been using my work's laptop to watch porn
The legendary Shit-Analogy Dictionary written by John Dunsworth aka Jim Lahey, Sunnyvale Trailer Park.
Winds of Shit
The mysterious winds of shit that bring with it only shit luck and other shit. When you just know that all kinds of shit are gonnna happen. The shit really hits the fan when the winds of shit are blowing. Normally, the strongest winds of shit can be found in a shit hurricane. Also, keep an eye out for shit hawks, which may take advantage of the incredible thermals produced from the winds of shit.
If you ever need a shit analogy then look no further than the Dicshitnary
Someone taking a hit for the team by fucking council housing lasses in order to keep them off the streets, therefore stop them getting knocked up by other council housing clowns
Bobby: Fuck me Dave, your a right Council Gritter! Is that how you met your wife?
The art of having another person pick Clag Nuts usually with teeth from your crusty ass hair
Boddy: Wifey, can we try Clag Nutting
A lovely way to tell someone to suck your dry hairy balls
Boddy: Dave, you bellend! This brew taste likes shit!!
Dave: why don't you Suck My Clinkers
A politer way of saying to a friend, i'm going to fuck your sister then sloppy jizz over her tits
Dave: Bobby, since you wouldn't make me a brew its Time To Chuck My Muck Over Your Sister's Jubblies
A polite way to say Go Fuck Yourself
Bobby: Hey Dave, make us a brew?
Dave: How about you Choke Your Chicken Up Your Charlie hole!!