George Vespe's definitions

Beaver pungent

Heradic device, symbolising a lack of hygiene on the female line.

"And the beaver pungent informs us the the third Lady Whelkingham was a stranger to soap" explained the professor.

by George Vespe May 11, 2008

Stoat reluctant

Heraldic device, symbolising unwillingness to engage in sexual acts.

"And we can see from the Stoat Reluctant in the coat of arms, that the second Earl was a cuckold" said the professor.

by George Vespe May 11, 2008

V&A Museum

Personal achive of hard core pornography.

My father-in-law offered to mow the lawn, and before I could stop him, he'd found the V&A Museum in the garden shed.

by George Vespe May 7, 2008

Hort

A humourous email, full of innuendo, that slips into your inbox at inopportune moments, making you laugh and giving you a snot bubble.

I was on the phone, trying to persuade my bank manager to extend my overdraft, when I received a Hort. The bastard didn't think I was taking my financial situation seriously.

by George Vespe May 7, 2008

Dinner in the Danube Delta

To perform oral sex on a very wet eastern European woman.

Svetlana invited me to dinner in the Danube Delta, and I had to breathe through my ears.

by George Vespe May 6, 2008

Squid Rampant

A heraldic device symbolising sexual potency, an erect penis.

After several bottles of Spanish wine, the professor found that a squid rampant was a brave thing to aspire to.

by George Vespe May 1, 2008

shit symphony

When everyone and everything in your life conspires to orchestrate a situation that is really shit.

2005 was one long shit symphony.

by George Vespe May 9, 2008