George Vespe's definitions

V&A Museum

Personal achive of hard core pornography.

My father-in-law offered to mow the lawn, and before I could stop him, he'd found the V&A Museum in the garden shed.

by George Vespe May 7, 2008

Hort

A humourous email, full of innuendo, that slips into your inbox at inopportune moments, making you laugh and giving you a snot bubble.

I was on the phone, trying to persuade my bank manager to extend my overdraft, when I received a Hort. The bastard didn't think I was taking my financial situation seriously.

by George Vespe May 7, 2008

Bocky

Yorkshire dialect; crooked or wonky.

She 'as a reet bocky nose.

by George Vespe April 28, 2008

Whelk

A charming cad, who uses bullshit and innuendo creatively, with the intention of getting into a posh girl's panties.

With his ginger hair it was clear that Prince Harry was sired by the whelk James Hewitt.

by George Vespe May 10, 2008

Squid Rampant

A heraldic device symbolising sexual potency, an erect penis.

After several bottles of Spanish wine, the professor found that a squid rampant was a brave thing to aspire to.

by George Vespe May 1, 2008

Uber Alice

Specialist form of Tutonic Bukkake, filmed with a very obliging frau.

Helga is a dirty scrubber, and likes nothing better than to star in a bit of Uber Alice in the evenings.

by George Vespe May 7, 2008

Dinner in the Danube Delta

To perform oral sex on a very wet eastern European woman.

Svetlana invited me to dinner in the Danube Delta, and I had to breathe through my ears.

by George Vespe May 6, 2008