I beat off all day yesterday when mom and dad left for work. Now I got the dog noodle today. I can’t touch it.
by Eaton Holgoode March 03, 2018
When you sneak into the bathroom and take a wicked foul shit while a friend, housemate or family member is taking a hot, steamy shower. Upon dropping the aromatic deuce, do not flush and leave. The aromatic vapors will begin to permeate the shower steam rendering the showerer unable to escape the vile and putrid stench.
Roger returned to the dorm after class and found his dorm mate showering. Knowing he had pinned up quite the rancid beer shit from the party the night before, Roger did a steam drop. Within a few minutes, Roger could her cursing and violent retching from the restroom.
by Eaton Holgoode October 07, 2015
An ass pirate. One who enjoys a little pillaging anal sex. See also ass wrangler, anal spelunker, rump ranger.
by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019
When an impromptu fisting of a co-worker over lunch break turns messy after the fister fails to roll up the cuff and sleeve of their dress shirt before performing this highly pleasurable act.
Hi Joe. What happened to your shirt? Spill hot chocolate?
No. I fisted Betty in accounting at lunch time today. We were running short on time and I forgot to roll up my sleeve.
Nasty. Ya got brown cuffed brooohhhh.
No. I fisted Betty in accounting at lunch time today. We were running short on time and I forgot to roll up my sleeve.
Nasty. Ya got brown cuffed brooohhhh.
by Eaton Holgoode October 19, 2015
Feverish and vigorous wanking and fapping of the male or female genitals. May be masturbation and self-gratification or a nice friendly helping hand from another to get you off.
Roger loves to hand wax watching internet porn.
Sheila likes to slip into the stall in the bathroom as work for a quick hand wax.
I paid that toothless prostitute $5 for a hand wax.
My step mom likes to slip into my room and give me a hand wax.
Rachel's first female experience was when her roommate gave her a hand wax.
Sheila likes to slip into the stall in the bathroom as work for a quick hand wax.
I paid that toothless prostitute $5 for a hand wax.
My step mom likes to slip into my room and give me a hand wax.
Rachel's first female experience was when her roommate gave her a hand wax.
by Eaton Holgoode April 18, 2017
A condition of the anus encountered after the consumption of extremely spicey foods. Generally induced from cayenne, habanero and jalepeno peppered snacks and mixes. Condition does not occur until defecation afterwhich the anus will burn for minutes or up to a half hour or more depending on digestive system tolerance. Recommended treatments include ice cubes, medicated pads and rags with witch hazel, creams, ointments, and salves.
After consuming an entire can of Original Juan Spicy Trail Mix, Leroy experienced a firey ass explosion that burned like batter acid which resulted in a Cayenne Fire Ring that burned for several minutes until he shoved a wash rag soaked in witch hazel on his ass crack.
by Eaton Holgoode June 04, 2009
A lousy blow job. When the person sucking your dick only mouths and lips it and never gets you to nut.
by Eaton Holgoode January 16, 2018