sports bag

A bag in which one's partner stands whilst having sex in a toilet cubicle, in order to avoid their feet being seen by the lavatory attendant.

Edward was planning a little trip to Picadilly Circus.
"Would one like to take one's sports bag?" asked his butler with a straight-face.

by Dunky Oggins January 25, 2004

spunk guzzler

a promiscuous woman.

June is a right spunk guzzler, 5 blokes gave her a roasting last night.

by Dunky Oggins October 30, 2003

mars bar

Excrement, or pertaining to defecation.

I'm just going to the toilet to do a mars bar.

by Dunky Oggins November 21, 2003

golden screw

Anal intercourse culminating in urination rather than ejaculation.

Charles sent his butler down to the garage to fetch some plastic sheeting.
"Dirty bugger," thought the butler, "He's gonna have a golden screw tonight."

by Dunky Oggins January 25, 2004

knocking shop

A brothel.

Kevin was very shocked to see several police cars pull up outside Alec's house. "I guess he's been seen interfering with his gnomes again" Kevin surmised.
"Nah" replied John, "The pigs were tipped off that he's been running a knocking shop."

by Dunky Oggins December 30, 2003

spastic chariot

An invalid carriage, that is a 3 wheel vehicle specially designed for disabled drivers, outlawed now in the UK on safety grounds.

I thought June would be impressed when i pulled up in my spastic chariot, but she just looked at me contemptuously.

by Dunky Oggins November 13, 2003

fuckleberry

semen stuck to one's pubic hair or body hair.

"I better go take a shower" said Elizabeth to a proud-looking Phillip, "I'm smoothered in fuckleberries."

by Dunky Oggins November 25, 2003