58 definitions by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd

What a lot of dumbfuck Monty Python fans think is actually a word. (I'm a fan, too, just not a dumbfuck.)

In the Cheese Shop Sketch, one character says to another, "It's staggeringly popular in this manor, squire." But if you google the word "manusquire," you'll see how many dumbfucks think that's what it is. The only references you'll see are where people transcribed the sketch and got the word(s) wrong and ones by other people who have read the first dumbfucks transcriptions and tried to parody the sketch in their lame forum postings, that just showed that they are worse than dumbfucks, they are DERIVITIVE dumbfucks.
Omg, we smart Python fans are going to have to kick the asses of the dumbfuck ones for adding "manusquire," yet another unnecessary word to our lingo.
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd July 31, 2007
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confusion either induced by the media or from which the media suffers; when the media obfuscates rather than enlightens.
I hope and pray that the American people can cut through the endless media haze and partisan nonsense and finally pick some responsible and intelligent leaders.
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd April 25, 2007
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The 2008 presidential candidate with the biggest balls. Man, that guy has balls the size of his homestate (Alaska).

He has said stuff like, that the "war was lost the day that George Bush invaded Iraq on a fraudulent basis." He doesn't have his finger to the wind. He just tells the damn truth. He's like the little boy in the Emperor's New Clothes.

Gravel has a campaign video (you can find it on the internet) where he just stares into the camera for a good two minutes and then picks up a rock and throws it in a pond and just walks off.

Balls, I tell you!
Man, that Mike Gravel dude has some ginormous balls.
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd June 26, 2007
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when you get an email from someone in Nigeria, who pretends to have been involved in some sort of coup de etat or related to some bigwig or something and says he's got the loot and needs a place to hide it, like your bank account and then they butter you up saying they got your name because you are known to be honest or some shit. They talk all weird and foreign and misspell stuff, to make you think that THEY are the gullible one.

They offer you a couple of million to store the ten million or so and then when you bite, they try to get your bank account info so they can steal your identity. If you are stupid enough, they'll have you writing them checks (or "advance fees") and they'll just keep stringing you along saying something went wrong and send more money.

Worst case scenario: they get you to fly over there. Never do that. Once you are in their clutches, you're, well, in their clutches.

Nigerian scam letter:

Dear Sir:

First I must solicit your confidence in this transaction. This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly confidential and top secret. We are top officials of the Federal Government Contract Review Panel who are interested in importation of goods into our country with funds which are presently trapped in Nigeria. In order to commence this business we solicit your assistance to enable us RECIEVE the said trapped funds ABROAD.

The source of this fund is as follows : During the regime of our late head of state, Gen. Sani Abacha, the government officials set up companies and awarded themselves contracts which were grossly over-invoiced in various Ministries. The NEW CIVILIAN Government set up a Contract Review Panel (C.R.P) and we have identified a lot of inflated contract funds which are presently floating in the Central Bank of Nigeria (C.B.N).

However, due to our position as civil servants and members of this panel, we cannot acquire this money in our names. I have therefore, been delegated as a matter of trust by my colleagues of the panel to look for an Overseas partner INTO whose ACCOUNT the sum of US$31,000,000.00 (Thirty one Million United States Dollars) WILL BE PAID BY TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER. Hence we are writing you this letter.We have agreed to share the money thus:

70% for us (the officials)

20% for the FOREIGN PARTNER (you)

10% to be used in settling taxation and all local and foreign expenses.

A SUITABLE NAME AND BANK ACCOUNT INTO WHICH THE FUNDS CAN BE PAID. PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO RESPOND BY TELEPHONE OR FAX.

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd April 8, 2007
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Fake chocolate on "Friends". Monica did a gig as a chef for the mockolate promoters. They wanted mockolate to become the traditional food of Thanksgiving. It bubbled, people made a face when they ate it. Phoebe said it was what evil tasted like.

The company that made it went out of business, but they still paid Monica. That was pretty cool, assuming the check cleared.
Monica: Okay, this is pumpkin pie with mockolate cookie crumb crust. This is mockolate cranberry cake, and these are mockolate chip cookies. Just like the Indians served.
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd July 1, 2008
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an extra slice of gravy-soaked bread inside a turkey sandwich to make it extra moist. Monica on "Friends" invented it and Ross named it. Ross got really upset one time, when his boss ate his sandwich with a moistmaker.
Ross: Oh-oh really? Did you confuse it with your own turkey sandwich with a moistmaker?
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd November 24, 2007
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born in 1941, coiner of the word meme. He has lately taken up the mantle of the late Madalyn Murray O'Hair and become the obnoxious atheist of the English-speaking world.

He wrote an essay called Viruses of the Mind, referring to religion. He calls believers, faith-sufferers, and disparages even those who are tolerant of others' faith. He thinks they are a large part of the problem.

Richard Dawkins, you sure are an arrogant atheist.
by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd April 9, 2007
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