Showing your entire family how you can deep throat the boiled Turkey neck before granny incorporates it into her Thanksgiving gravy.
My cousin showed up for thanksgiving and did the Julia child tribute. Not even a gag or a watered eye. Took the whole thing. Guess I know who’s room I’ll be sneaking into.
by Dick Onchin November 20, 2020
Get the Julia Child Tribute mug.The whole room cleared out when he started to spread seasoning.
I was taking her to pound town from behind when she spread seasoning and it was wafting right up my nostrils.
I tried to shit but only spread seasoning.
I was taking her to pound town from behind when she spread seasoning and it was wafting right up my nostrils.
I tried to shit but only spread seasoning.
by Dick Onchin January 08, 2022
Get the Spread Seasoning mug.The amalgam of semen, lube and juices built up around the labia of a filthy whore with a rank case of stank puss.
I was going to eat her out but the anchovy paste was more than I could take.
The anchovy paste in the gusset of my cousin’s panties was really repugnant.
The prostitute I picked up had the worst anchovy paste so I had to just settle for an old fashioned.
The anchovy paste in the gusset of my cousin’s panties was really repugnant.
The prostitute I picked up had the worst anchovy paste so I had to just settle for an old fashioned.
by Dick Onchin December 02, 2020
Get the Anchovy Paste mug.When you nut so hard from hacking off that you tense up and throw your neck backwards and give yourself a mild case of whiplash.
Damn bro my neck is killing me. Did you jacklash yourself again? Yea damn near put my head through the wall this time.
by Dick Onchin November 12, 2020
Get the Jacklash mug.Someone that gets your cock hard without knowing they are having such a filthy impact on your day.
The involuntary fluffer can cause this by just walking by, a friendly smile or chat. The possibilities are endless as are the erections.
The involuntary fluffer can cause this by just walking by, a friendly smile or chat. The possibilities are endless as are the erections.
My new boss has no idea that she’s my involuntary fluffer.
The maid because my involuntary fluffer every Thursday.
The maid because my involuntary fluffer every Thursday.
by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020
Get the Involuntary Fluffer mug.The anal swab covid test administered by the Chinese government on visiting foreigners. Soon to be enjoyed by travelers worldwide.
How was your trip to China? It was great. I had the wuhan rim job as soon as we landed. How was it? Let’s just say I got tested three times.
by Dick Onchin March 04, 2021
Get the Wuhan Rim Job mug.Using one’s own sock or socks to wash and wipe the asshole after dropping a horrifically mud butt style shit or accidentally shitting oneself and there is no toilet paper or other tissue.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
After spending the entire day drinking beer and eating hot wings, I headed home. After about a mile, I felt the gut bubblies. Hoping to release some pressure, I unloaded what I thought was a massive fart but ended up shitting my pants. I spotted a gas station on the corner and quickly headed to the shitter. I waddled to the door praying the steamy, oozing, wet lump would not slide any further down my leg. I made it to the stall only to find there was no toilet paper or paper towels. I slipped off both socks knowing a Texas wet wipe was my only alternative. I moistened them in the sink and then I slid the cold, wet socks up and down my ass crack like dental floss cleaning what had to look like the field at a tractor pull and a rooster’s tail when it came out. I got it as clean as I could get it and at least enough to not itch too much before I got home, I tossed my socks in the corner and slipped my boots back on and headed on my way.
by Dick Onchin November 03, 2020
Get the Texas Wet Wipe mug.