Dharma Midget's definitions

Sriracha moustache

The result of sex with a menstruating woman, then wiping your penis on her face.

"Dude, your sister's a freak. She asked me to give her a sriracha moustache. I had to look it up. I mean, I did it, but still..."

by Dharma Midget March 8, 2017

trump

The explosive backflow from a clogged toilet. An uncontrolled river of shit.

I shit liquid fire after three stright Chipotle meals. My shitter did a trump on me like I'd never seen -- I was covered in runny pseudo-Mexican seconds all day.

by Dharma Midget December 7, 2016

Allahu Snackbar

When severe munchies start, it's time to hit the fridge/snack food aisle/Taco Bell with the ferocity of a terrorist trying to buy the affection of his/her imaginary friend in the sky. Allahu snackbar is the declaration of intention in such a scenario.

"Dude, is the blunt done?"
"Yeah, why?"
"I'm 'bout to 9-11 your fridge. ALLAHU SNACKBAR!"

Although his friends agreed that it was their favorite moment of the road trip, Steven realized that yelling "ALLAHU SNACKBAR!" in the McDonald's drive-thru was not the smartest idea he'd ever had.

by Dharma Midget November 21, 2016

putpocketing

The opposite of pickpocketing. Involves placing something into someone's pocket without their knowledge. Often used by street performers or musicians as a promotional tool. Can also be great fun with strangers and random embarrassing items.

No one came to my last show. Time to try putpocketing the flyers!

by Dharma Midget November 7, 2016

egg swap

Sharing semen, usually by spitting it from one mouth to another. So named for the raw egg texture of a load of cum.

I don't know how to feel about my girlfriend -- she wants to egg swap after I fuck her in the ass and go shrimpin'.

by Dharma Midget October 20, 2016

hillbilly weekend

Refers to a weekend (or other extended period of liesure time) spent with "just the guys," for the purpose of fishing, hunting, card playing, etc., that inadvertantly
culminates with sexual acts with each other, always with the stipulation of no homo before the act.

Tim, Billy, Gordon, and I are leaving for a hillbilly weekend on Friday. I can't wait -- ever since Stacy left me last month, I feel like I'm gonna explode. My arm fucking hurts...

by Dharma Midget October 20, 2016

titstracted

When you unintentionally drop out of a conversation, drive into oncoming traffic, or run over the neighbor's cat with your lawnmower because your attention was drawn away by a beautiful woman and/or perfect tits. The male equivalent to dickstracted.

I got so titstracted when I saw Amber Rose at the mall that I tripped into a twenty-minute fall down the up escalator.

by Dharma Midget September 21, 2016