David Cowpell Downtrodden's definitions

dowl

to mumble interminably about any obsolete work of literature out of print since 1878, whilst playing random but worrying flute and writing your life story simultaneously with both hands. Ambidextrous? Fucking crazy.

"Is everything okay? You look pale."
"I don't know. I've just been Dowled, and need to rest my numbed mind."
"Poor unfortunate you. Those rogues are everywhere."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden October 1, 2004

Rathmines

Portal of absolute lunacy and hotbed of psychotic behaviour. Where dense legions of the disturbed appear, reappear and vanish indiscriminately, hounded by invisible demons and caught eternally between the havens of Ranelagh
and Rathgar, longing to find their way home. "It's under the stairs in the Swan Centre!", I shouted, but to no avail. They just walked through me.

"Does this bus go to Rathmines?"
"No. NO. GOD NO! PLEASE. NOT THAT PLACE. ANYWHERE BUT THAT PLACE! LEAVE NOW. WHILE YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE. THEY WILL KILL YOU ALL. ALL OF YOU. FLEE! FLEE FOR YOUR DEAR LIVES!"

by David Cowpell Downtrodden September 2, 2004

paprika

a complete and utter prick. there is none other more prickular on the face of the planet. Comprendez?

"Alan stole his cousin's car and got pulled over drunk whilst delivering four stolen tellys to his mate's gaff, like a complete paprika."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden March 26, 2004

Mama Red Cap

Almost human creature that beetles around Rathmines wearing a red cap, talking loudly to it's selves. Hat functions as a beacon for psychotic activity but also makes a fine, fine storage vehicle. Ideal for carrying spuds.

"Mama's red cap is white today."
"Shit! I didn't see the change coming."
"You just aren't street enough."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden September 2, 2004

bovinity

The absolute antithesis of sincere behaviour in human form. Namely executed in completely nonsensical and ridiculous taskmaking within the workplace, encouraging the widest possible deviation from the direct route of A to B (via Z). Also an adequate description of idiotic juvenile behaviour (the like last seen in the playground) carried out by a grown woman/beast.

"Could you immediately fill out five forms in triplicate for the next toilet paper order?"
"Yes! In the name of insane bovinity, I shall! (Ya fat heifer)."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden March 26, 2004

humperbatch

One who chooses to bid farewell with a jolting thrust of the groin amid mass confusion and semi hysteria whilst possessed by the spirit of Sir Stephen Hawking.

"It is now time for me to depart."
"Yes. Farewell you fiend."
"Allow me to hump you over the threshold by means of strange familiarity."
"So be it, humperbatch."
"Parting is such sweet sorrow."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden September 3, 2004

bovidence

potentially hazardous items of foodstuff wrappery that are destined to clash headlong with a bovate's sense of right and wrong. And bring you immense grief for, (wait for it), no apparent sensical reason.

"Did you enjoy that twisty fries and milkshake, oh downtrodden colleague of mine?"
"Yes, it war tres filling, though a little wrong."
"Be sure to hide the bovidence."
"I shall. Thank you for the valuable advice."

by David Cowpell Downtrodden September 2, 2004