Cunningest Linguist's definitions

wikipedia

The world's largest forum for anonymous arguments. Argue with everyone in the world on any topic imaginable. You may be Stephen Hawking, so-called "expert", but you need to reconcile your views on black holes with Bob from Idaho who thinks they are portals to Narnia and find some neutral point of view that you can both agree on.

I wanted to find a place to argue about Bruce Jenner's Wheaties boxes and found Wikipedia.

by Cunningest Linguist May 16, 2006

posting

A traditional execution method where a person is lifted onto a sharp stake in the ground and impaled rectally. The body weight slowly causes the person to be further impaled until a vital organ is reached, causing death.

I hereby sentence you, Rosie O'Donnell, to death by posting.

by Cunningest Linguist October 2, 2006

Democrat

Someone who can take a bad Republican idea and make it worse.

Republican: Let's suspend the Bill of Rights.
Democrat: Great idea! Then, let's mandate everyone to eat their own feces to reduce their individual carbon footprints.

by Cunningest Linguist August 14, 2008

Tiger Woods

To get divorced by way of playing 18 holes on the skanky public course when you've got a perfectly good place to use your putter in your own house.

Suddenly, doing the Tiger Woods tour took on a whole new meaning.

by Cunningest Linguist January 1, 2010

insurance

A business that involves selling people promises to pay later that are never fulfilled.

Gomer paid flood insurance premium for years, but then the insurer decided to go out of business when the flood came because management had spent all the premium on hookers and private jets.

by Cunningest Linguist August 14, 2008

obama

(v) To make a remarkable political comeback. Named after al Qaeda terrorist founder/US presidential candidate Barack Obama Hussein bin Laden, who went from being the most hated man in America after 9/11 to being elected president of the United States.

It took years, but OJ Simpson was able to obama his way back to respectability.

by Cunningest Linguist June 16, 2008

asspwned

A combination of assraped and pwned, implying not only that the victim was pwned, but assraped as well to add to the humiliation. Can be used as a stronger form of pwned, suggesting that the victor was not satisfied merely to pwn but additionally used the victim for his own personal gratification in an anal sex kind of way.

Despite all the prison yard smacktalk, Chris was asspwned by his cellmate Boomer once the lights went out.

by Cunningest Linguist May 16, 2006