To 'do ugly' means to have coitus under embarrassing or unappealing circumstances.
Kathleen was so horny that she even wanted to do ugly with Charlie on the Mississippi coast seawall.
A Sooner is a guy with a premature ejaculation problem.
Hazel was totally frustrated; Bill was a Sooner and finished after only two minutes.
When a person would like to comment on a useless feature on something, he or she can compare it to a duck wearing a necktie.
Cut out vents and a fox tail on the antenna? That's like a duck wearing a necktie.
Buy a
duck wearing a necktie
mug!
When a woman is wearing them loose this means that she is not wearing a bra.
Kathy was wearing them loose when we went out last night. Each was a real handfull
Buy a
wearing them loose
mug!
A pony shot is a 1.0 ounce shot of alcoholic beverage (whiskey or brandy); as opposed to a regular shot which contains 1.5 ounce of alcohol.
Some bar equipment consists of an hourglass-shaped measuring device; with the pony shot on one end and the regular shot on the other.
A Methodist pecker checker is a girl who, when making time with a guy, feels his penis and masturbates him if he is tumescent.
Charlene is a Methodist pecker checker; she guarantees a good time.
Buy a
Methodist pecker checker
mug!
