45 definitions by Chad Chett
A person who gets easily offended. A keyboard Emily can be found on pretty much any social media app but are commonly found on the popular app called tik tok. They typically have anime profile pictures or the BLM fist. They’re typically the ages of 12-17 and act like they’re the most intelligent and woke mfs on the planet. They are usually fans of the racist modern warrior and will make being “woke” their personality. They also hate men or blonde white women, probably because their dad left them and they got bullied by a popular blonde girl. If you offend them on Tik Tok, they’ll call you names like Mayo Monkey or Unseasoned even though they’re whiter than a Cracker Barrel on Sunday. They’ll also make fun of your looks and will say stuff like “I know you aren’t talking” or “What’s up with your hair”, but they should not be talking as they have rainbow hair and double chins.
Oh look I have a new tik tok comment…. And would you believe that it’s a 12 year old they/them calling me a mayo monkey insulting my looks. I guess I struck a nerve with this keyboard Emily.
by Chad Chett January 13, 2022
A fancy way of saying a person is for the streets. People will be like “I have commitment issues” but what they really mean is that they cannot be loyal to their significant other. If someone says they commitment issues then it’s a guarantee that they belong to the streets and they’re gonna play you and even cheat on you. Commitment issues = Red Flag = For The Streets
by Chad Chett November 26, 2021
A highly affluent suburb located in the city of Houston Texas. Cypress Texas ranks in the top 50 most affluent zip codes in the United States. 95% of Cypress Texas includes huge houses unless you’re talking about the poorer neighborhoods such as Bonaire. The people that live there are pretentious and do not like people from other parts of Houston especially down town. The suburb is also white af, everyone and their mama wears vineyard vines, lululemon, and Patagonia. Everyone there is attractive tho probably because their parents are attractive and were handed everything.
by Chad Chett January 18, 2022
That one fine ass person that you’ll see in the hallways of school that you lowkey have mad feelings for but can never get the courage nor opportunity to talk to them. You don’t even know their name yet they live in your head rent free. You’ve probably imagined scenarios of them. You’ll wonder wether or not the feelings are reciprocated. You’re not sure if they fw you because they look at you and sometimes smile at you, but at the same time they don’t bother adding your socials or even initiate a simple conversation.
I still remember that fine girl that used to look at me and smile in the hallways. I never knew her name but she was fine af. She’s my hallway crush
by Chad Chett January 31, 2022
Overpriced caffeinated water. For 5 dollars or more you will get a below average Frappuccino that tastes like a mix of tap water and cheap flavorings. You’re pretty paying 25 cents for the ingredients and $4.75 for the logo. It doesn’t help that the average consumer is an upper-middle class basic white girl that drives her daddy’s jeep to Starbucks before she meets her friends at target.
by Chad Chett January 30, 2022
A body type that is not obese nor severely overweight but also not too muscular or skinny. Women who have these bodies are typically 5-20 pounds overweight but in the right places. A mom bod typically has thick thighs, a soft and plump but also small stomach, and a big but not excessive butt. Women with mom bods also have good facial structure too. For instance you might be able to make out a jawline or prominent cheekbones. Women with this body type are VERY ATTRACTIVE and are highly desired by men. This post may seem backhanded but I promise you as a member of the male species this body type is fine af. Y’all look amazing (especially in leggings) and y’all give the best cuddles and hugs so there are no complaints on my end. However one thing to note is that all bodies are beautiful however this body type is severely and I mean severely underrated but most men low key love it :)
by Chad Chett November 22, 2021
A mf who will defend a girl he has feelings for to the death. He will treat her like royalty, buying expensive gifts, food, and even give her his Netflix account. He will also be seen commenting stuff like “Go bestie 😍” or “Material Girl 😌” on her Instagram. While he’s treating her like an A-list celebrity she’s treating him like a fan or peasant. She’s showing her sneaky link or boyfriend the cringeworthy texts that the simp sends her. She also uses his Netflix as background noise while her real man rearranges her guts so that her parents won’t hear her cheeks getting slapped. The simp will do this just so that his crush will acknowledge him in hopes of the simp smashing or dating the girl. All the simp gets in return is “Thanks Bro” or “You’re my bestest Bestie 💙”. He will also defend a girl for being a hoe by saying, “She doesn’t do it for you” or “Leave Her Alone or I’ll fight you”. If there’s one emoji to describe a simp it’s 🤡
Simp: so what if she has 120 bodies she is a confident woman that you could never pull.
Me asf: ight simp she let the whole football, basketball, baseball, and even band team hit and yet to her you’re her bestie 4 life. You seriously bought her 300 dollars worth of lululemon, Starbucks and Chicfila, and you gave her your Netflix, Disney Plus, and paramount plus account knowing she has 3 sneaky links lmao
Me asf: ight simp she let the whole football, basketball, baseball, and even band team hit and yet to her you’re her bestie 4 life. You seriously bought her 300 dollars worth of lululemon, Starbucks and Chicfila, and you gave her your Netflix, Disney Plus, and paramount plus account knowing she has 3 sneaky links lmao
by Chad Chett January 11, 2022