Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Sissy

A guy who gets out of the bathtub to take a leak.
A guy who takes his chew out before he eats.

Walden is a great big sissy. He steps into the can to scratch his arse.

by Cap'n Bullmoose July 3, 2008

cigarette

A roll of stink weed rolled in paper, found in the mouth of a redneck, skank, monkey, idiot, wino, bum, or fool. It is the cause of ash tray breath.

A Camel butt.

Belinda thinks she smells good with a cigarette in her mouth.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005

Congestion Fee

A Congestion Fee is yet another tax scheme devised by limp-wristed liberals to crush the working poor. The liberals charge a Congestion Fee to drive a car on a designated roadway during certain hours. The liberals say that charging this fee will get people to stop driving and take public transportation. Of course, rich people and dual-income Yuppies don't mind paying the fee, because they have money coming out their arse. But the working poor and single-income families will be crushed by the fees.

Many large cities are considering charging a Congestion Fee to drive on busy streets during rush hours. The limp-wristed liberal mush wimps want to charge these fees to force the working poor to take public transportation. And of course, public transportation in many cities is filled with hip hop idiots playing their ghetto blasters and threatening honest citizens with bodily harm.

Congestion Fees are just like another liberal desire: 5-dollar-a-gallon gasoline. Rich fat cats and dual-income Yuppies don't mind it, but it smashes the working poor.

by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007

Italian tuxedo

A man's white sleeveless undershirt.

Also commonly called an Italian dinner jacket or IDJ.

Johnny wore his Italian tuxedo when he applied for the new job.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005

kybo

An outhouse.

A portable fiberglass commode.

This word arose early in the twentieth century, and is reputed to be an acronym for "Keep Your Bowels Open." The word is universal among Boy Scouts and RAGBRAI bicyclists in Iowa.

If you guys don't wise up, you'll have to clean the kybo.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005

apostrophe

A punctuation mark that stooges, idiots, morons, dorks, and ignorant people put in front of the letter "s" with amazing inconsistency.

The sign outside the fruit stand said "Grape's, Apple's, and Peache's."

Butch puts an apostrophe before every final "s" in a sentence. He writes "Mr's. Hennessey say's we should alway's warsh our hand's after we come in from reces's. Especially after you take a pis's.

by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007

Schroedinger's Cat

A hypothetical experiment in quantum mechanics that allegedly proves that a cat can be alive and dead at the same time. This conclusion smack's of Bishop Berkeley's notion that if nobody is in a forest to hear a falling tree, the tree makes no sound.

Schroedinger's Cat is not half alive and half dead. It is either alive or dead, and we have to open the box to find out. If we lose interest and refuse to open the box, the chances of the cat being dead increase greatly with time.

by Cap'n Bullmoose November 11, 2006