Definitions by Bonny lad

Choirboy's Arse 

A term which is often used to describe complicated parking manoevres.

"There's a space, park in there."
"No way will I get this Transit van in there mate, that space looks tighter than a choirboy's arse!"

Choirboy's Arse by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

mouse's ear 

Opposite of clown's pocket.

"That's the stuff... Ooh yeh!"

mouse's ear by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

Slap 

When used in the configuration of 'having a slap' it means to masturbate.

Bill: D'you want to go to the match tonight?
Dave: Nah, I was going to stay in and have a slap.

Slap by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

Slap 

Generic term for make-up.

"I'll look beautiful once I've put on a bit of slap."
"I seriously doubt it, Brian."

Slap by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

part me hair 

When you want to go for a number two, you are in fact going to 'part your hair'.

"Bloody kebab. I'm off to part me hair."

part me hair by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

send an urgent fax 

verb. To become suddenly taken away from whatever you are doing by the vast need to deposit a particularly tempestuous turd which gives no warning of its presence whatsoever until the very last minute.

Sexy new secretary: "So, do you want to grab a bite to eat?"
You: (face going purple) "Sorry love, I've got to send an urgent fax."

send an urgent fax by Bonny lad November 11, 2004

Face Like A 

...smacked arse, bag of spanners, box of frogs, bulldog chewing on a wasp, smashed crab, Chernobyl Fireman's Head etc.

Ugly beyond reproach.

Dave: "That lad's got a face like a chernobyl fireman's head."
Bill: "As I understand it, he was in fact a chernobyl fireman."
Dave: "(sings) #It's a wonderful life...#" (etc)

Face Like A by Bonny lad November 11, 2004