Big Jack's Bollocks's definitions

satan's dumplings

Dog poo

We had a great party round at ours last week, unfortunately someone gave our lass's Bedlington terrier a bowl of Guinness and beef vindaloo the next morning the kitchen floor was covered in satan's dumplings

by Big Jack's Bollocks May 13, 2017

assgassination

When your using a public loo for a poo and someone goes into the cubicle next to you and does a really nasty loud smelly shit that is so offensive it makes you feel really unwell

I was in the shitters at the metro nipping one off when this guy went in the next cubicle and really dropped his guts, it was loud, splaterry and it stunk, I think it was an assgassination attempt!

by Big Jack's Bollocks June 14, 2018

arse like a rabbit's nose

A way of describing your anus when you've had too much vindaloo and beer the night before

Sorry dude couldn't make it for lunch, got an Indian takeaway and a six pack of Guinness last night and I've had an arse like a rabbit's nose since this morning, it hasn't stopped twitching

by Big Jack's Bollocks July 7, 2017

Boxer's lipstick

The exposed part of a dog's penis when they get a hard on

It was really going well after my foxy neighbour came over for coffee, however it all went south after Tyson got excited and showed his boxer's lipstick.

by Big Jack's Bollocks May 16, 2017

Satan's dumplings

A term for dog faeces

Had the lads over last night, they fed the wife's bedlington terrier 3 bowls of vindaloo, woke up this morning and the kitchen floor is covered with satan's dumplings!

by Big Jack's Bollocks May 14, 2017

Fake Summit

A Fake Summit is the phenomenon that occurs when you go hill walking for the first time, i.e. you think you’ve reached the top of a hill but when you get to where you think is the top of the hill you realise there’s more climbing to do. Fake Summits sap morale and make people grumpy.

“That new girl who cane hill walking is really high maintenance, she had a proper hissy fit halfway up Blister Hill” Yes she did, she cracked after experiencing her 3rd Fake Summit”

by Big Jack's Bollocks December 29, 2018

fart buffer

The wind present in your bowel that stops you from needing a ful blown poo

Last night was really embarrassing. I used my fart buffer up and shit myself on the way to the night club

by Big Jack's Bollocks May 14, 2017