BenchMax345's definitions

OHLAP

Oklahoma Higher Learner Access Program (abbrev. OHLAP) is an Oklahoma's Promise scholarship granted for low income parents. Parents with an income of less than $50,000 a year and high school student(s) who worked their ass off earned it. There are specific high school courses that must be taken in order for OHLAP to be rewarded. OHLAP is one of the fastest growing scholarships in Oklahoma. OHLAP pays full tuition towards your college degree. This is a very godly/Chuck Norris scholarship that people take for granted. To date, over 30,000 students enrolled for OHLAP since its inception (source: my high school counselor). The higher your parent’s income, the better your ACT scores have to be in order to achieve…OHLAP (ACT score of a 30 right here BOOYAH! Flawlessly pwned). In order for the effects of this scholarship to remain beneficial, you must maintain a grade point average of an A> (3.60>.) and "promise" to stay away from trouble (i.e. drugs, alcohol, your mom). This scholarship can only be negated by successfully acquiring your bachelor degree or simply "student of failures." On the negative side of the spectrum, if you procrastinated your ass off and haven't procure your bachelor degree within the five years period, then OHLAP's powerful effects will eventually diminish; hence, your balls will be tragically suppress in a hectic manner (which in turn leads to death of purple balls). Absurdly, OHLAP has some dark secrets to deny its existence by your side (which will, in terms, give you a deadly purple nurple). For more history on OHLAP, you must google it. I'm only here to provide this information b/c I have too much time in my hands. Yes, I know; I'm very immature, but I'm hope you're smart enough to tie your own shoes and determine which information is false (i.e. your balls and breast being mutilated).

Vy and I got OHLAP b/c we pwned every AP courses. And mainly, b/c I can bench press 345lbs in high school and pwned the AP Calculus exam with a five. OHLAP is pleased. HOOAH!

by benchmax345 August 25, 2008

angraffiti

A graffiti artwork that bleeds anger toward a person's eyes. An angraffiti usually express as a form of protest.

Hippies' angraffiti is futile against a conservative nation like the U.S.

by BenchMax345 February 29, 2008

Valentineless

Someone who does not have a valentine. They seek hope, but they face a severe beat down. Although this symptom temporary, it may lead to a catastrophic event.

Friend: Who's your valentine?
Me: No one, I'm Valentineless.
Friend: Oh.

by BenchMax345 February 14, 2008

Fake Bacon

This word can be use to describe any person who fake noticeable "tanish" skin. Although their friends may say that they look "naturally" tan, it's a lie. It is clearly noticeable. Let's not lie to ourself here. What is natural is the skin color that you were born with. In conclusion, if you think you need a tan, then the truth is that you put yourself below every normal human being. On the plus side, you Fake Bacon provide society with laughter and entertainment with your fake tan look. Congrats.

Chick (came to a party sizzling): Sup gangsta! Do you like my new tan?
Random Person: Dude, you're a fake bacon! lol
Chick: (Leave the party and cry.)

by BenchMax345 February 15, 2008

w^5

w^5 is read as w to the fifth. w^5 is translated to "which was what we wanted."

David: We got the answer to be 56 cm cube. Now, I'm going to check the answer...and it is 56 cm cube... w^5 BOOYAH!

by BenchMax345 February 8, 2009

pro-crastinating

Someone who severely procrastinate and loses their amenity of procrastinating; therefore, the heavy procrastinators become pro at crastinating.

David: Mr. Goodger, I'm going to procrastinate on my Trig and Pre-AP Physics test. I'm good at procrastinating.
Mr. Goodger: Be careful David, if you procrastinate too much, you will lose your amenity become a pro at crastinating. In other word, pro-crastinating.
David: Ha! whateva, da crew n i r goin' driftin' at da zoo!

by BenchMax345 March 20, 2008

Cancun

A place where you have OVER 9000 percent chance of having sex or losing your virginity. Cancun is a place where you can be drunk 25/7, not 24/7. It is place where alcohol is available everywhere you turn to. Nobody down in Cancun will ID you. In fact, nobody gives a shit. However, going to the airport with a hangover can be a bitch and a half.

I went to Cancun and a lot happened ;)

by BenchMax345 February 24, 2009