35 definitions by BenchMax345
by BenchMax345 March 4, 2008
First of all, an average emo person weigh approximately 155lbs. that's pretty skinny and light. In order to activate emo-power bomb, first, one must be able to hang clean 185lbs, vertically bench press(135lbs.) the person 2 feet from your shoulders, and slam his/her back on the floor as hard as possible. Although emo-power bomb can be powerful, it can also be negate by a fat wiggling emo kid. Yes, emo-power bomb is considered a hate crime. This action is also considered unconstitutional.
Dumb Jock: Dude, it's an emo kid. What are you doing sitting on our lunch table.
Emo kid: I'm writing sad poetry.
Dumb Jock: Go Go Gadget emo-power bomb!(Emo kid quickly elevated above the dumb jock's shoulders)
Emo kid: Nooooooooo! (SLLLAAMMM right through the lunch table)
Dumb Jock: You just got pwn.
Emo kid: I'm writing sad poetry.
Dumb Jock: Go Go Gadget emo-power bomb!(Emo kid quickly elevated above the dumb jock's shoulders)
Emo kid: Nooooooooo! (SLLLAAMMM right through the lunch table)
Dumb Jock: You just got pwn.
by BenchMax345 March 1, 2008
Oklahoma Higher Learner Access Program (abbrev. OHLAP) is an Oklahoma's Promise scholarship granted for low income parents. Parents with an income of less than $50,000 a year and high school student(s) who worked their ass off earned it. There are specific high school courses that must be taken in order for OHLAP to be rewarded. OHLAP is one of the fastest growing scholarships in Oklahoma. OHLAP pays full tuition towards your college degree. This is a very godly/Chuck Norris scholarship that people take for granted. To date, over 30,000 students enrolled for OHLAP since its inception (source: my high school counselor). The higher your parent’s income, the better your ACT scores have to be in order to achieve…OHLAP (ACT score of a 30 right here BOOYAH! Flawlessly pwned). In order for the effects of this scholarship to remain beneficial, you must maintain a grade point average of an A> (3.60>.) and "promise" to stay away from trouble (i.e. drugs, alcohol, your mom). This scholarship can only be negated by successfully acquiring your bachelor degree or simply "student of failures." On the negative side of the spectrum, if you procrastinated your ass off and haven't procure your bachelor degree within the five years period, then OHLAP's powerful effects will eventually diminish; hence, your balls will be tragically suppress in a hectic manner (which in turn leads to death of purple balls). Absurdly, OHLAP has some dark secrets to deny its existence by your side (which will, in terms, give you a deadly purple nurple). For more history on OHLAP, you must google it. I'm only here to provide this information b/c I have too much time in my hands. Yes, I know; I'm very immature, but I'm hope you're smart enough to tie your own shoes and determine which information is false (i.e. your balls and breast being mutilated).
Vy and I got OHLAP b/c we pwned every AP courses. And mainly, b/c I can bench press 345lbs in high school and pwned the AP Calculus exam with a five. OHLAP is pleased. HOOAH!
by BenchMax345 July 30, 2008
People who follow the retard ideologies. Retardationalism is usually used by midlife crisis, high school students, and ADDs to gain attention in class. Retardationalism is lead by Hillary Clinton. R-tards are the people who follows the concept of Retardationalism.
by BenchMax345 February 25, 2008
A rare species of eagles. Ball eagles can appear suddenly at any given time. Ball Eagle exist to attack only men(not women). Ball eagle will purposely attack your balls if you're not careful. Ball Eagle can fly 1745% faster than the maximum speed of an original bald eagle. Ball eagles fly at full speed, without delay or hesitation, directly into your balls.
Josh and I was flying kites one day. Suddenly, a ball eagle flew straight into Josh's balls hence destroying his family jewels.
by BenchMax345 March 1, 2008
Oklahoma State University-Oklahoma City (OSU-OKC). This word can be use in place of retard, moron, dumbass, and any negativity word use to describe a living or non-living things. OSU-OKC ridiculously have a lock down browser while students and staffs can use a cam to film all the test questions and answer. More than 34% of the students are taking Intermediate Algebra and below. More than 46% fail College Algebra and below. Although some people are 4.0 GPA students, the fact is that we take easy class. Therefore, if you make a B at OSUOKC, then you're a retard. Furthermore, 60% of the students are computer illiterate
At Aspen gym: Ashley was rushing across the basketball court dribbling the ball at "Chuck Norris" speed. 3.14159 seconds later...She trip over the basketball. I said "Ashley, quit being an OSU-OKC.
Student #1 (at age 30 i.e. midlife crisis): Dude, how to you solve this?
Student #2: Like whoaaaaa (with both hands up in the air) x^2-6x+9=0??? solve for x???? Let me take it to my remedial math teacher in middle school.
Student #1 (at age 30 i.e. midlife crisis): Dude, how to you solve this?
Student #2: Like whoaaaaa (with both hands up in the air) x^2-6x+9=0??? solve for x???? Let me take it to my remedial math teacher in middle school.
by BenchMax345 February 2, 2008
This word can be use to describe any person who fake noticeable "tanish" skin. Although their friends may say that they look "naturally" tan, it's a lie. It is clearly noticeable. Let's not lie to ourself here. What is natural is the skin color that you were born with. In conclusion, if you think you need a tan, then the truth is that you put yourself below every normal human being. On the plus side, you Fake Bacon provide society with laughter and entertainment with your fake tan look. Congrats.
Chick (came to a party sizzling): Sup gangsta! Do you like my new tan?
Random Person: Dude, you're a fake bacon! lol
Chick: (Leave the party and cry.)
Random Person: Dude, you're a fake bacon! lol
Chick: (Leave the party and cry.)
by BenchMax345 February 15, 2008