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BeardedFatass's definitions

photo finish

(n) an urgent need to defecate, usually associated with diarrhea, in which the bowels begin to move before the victim has reached the shitter
As Bob raced down the hallway, he clenched his butt-cheeks together as tightly as he could to stave the impending explosion of fecal matter. This was definitely going to be a photo finish.
by BeardedFatass January 6, 2004
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froot

(n) brightly-colored chemical sweetners used to simulate fruit but legally forbidden by the FDA to be labeled as such

(adj) flavored with froot
Without looking, it's easier to guess the color of an M&M than the color of a Froot Loop.
by BeardedFatass April 5, 2004
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snail mail

Etymology: Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert
(n) conventional mail in which a letter or package is physically delivered by a postal service, esp. when the object mailed could have been sent electronically via email/e-mail and arrived at the destination instantly
Paranoid about "hackers" spying on him, my boss insists on sending all correspondence via snail mail, which means I can't use my spam filter to ignore him.
by BeardedFatass January 9, 2004
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ch

(n) the fourth letter of the Spanish alphabet
Would someone please explain to me how ch is a letter?! It's TWO letters: c + h, which are BOTH already in the Spanish alphabet! How is ch its own letter?! (Don't even get me started on rr...)
by BeardedFatass January 20, 2004
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!!

slightly more shocking than ! but not quite as shocking as !!!
Exclamation points always seem to come in ones and threes!!
by BeardedFatass October 1, 2004
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mustard booger

(n) the little crusty bit of mustard that forms at the nozzle of a squeezable mustard container
Before squeezing mustard all over my hot weiner, I picked off the mustard booger.
by BeardedFatass December 16, 2002
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X

1. (prep) multiplied by
2. (n) radio station that plays the same four songs every hour
3. (adj) used to describe an object that prevents work from being done
4. (n) the archnemesis of O in Tic Tac Toe
5. (adj) located between a Z and a C
6. (n) a strike on Family Feud
7. (n) a mark on a scholastic examination that indicates "Wrong answer, Dumbass!"
8. (n) a letter in a naughty word - most commonly U, C, or K
9. (n) a kiss (plural XX or XXX)
X. (n) the Roman numeral ten
1. 5 X 2 = 10
2. You're listening to 102.1 - The X! That was the latest from Linkin Park. Coming up next hour, it's...Linkin Park. But first, here's "Jeremy" by Pearl Jam on 102.1 - The X!
3. I just got a new game for the X Box.
4.
X|X|0
0|0|X
X|0|
5. I need to press the X key once to type this sentence.
6. Show me...potato salad! (X)
X 7. The capital of Florida is F.
8. I don't give a fXXX what you think about this fXXXing definition!
9. I love you XXX
X. 10
by BeardedFatass January 12, 2004
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