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Alfie The Horndog's definitions

Jesus Christ

The name Bill Cosby thought was his growing up. He thought his brothers name was "God Dammit".

According to Cosby's classic stand-up routine, his father would always yell at him and his brother.

Something like: "Jesus Christ, it's raining, get in here. God Dammit, you get in here too.".

But then one day he was playing in the yard alone and his father called him: "God Dammit, quit making such a racket!" Bill just stood there looking around for his brother. "God Dammit didn't you hear me?" yelled his father to which Bill replied, "But dad, I'm Jesus Christ!"
Jesus Christ, the Simpsons are killing us in the ratings! God Dammit we're being forced into cancellation because of a stupid cartoon!
by Alfie The Horndog September 17, 2005
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Titty Twister

The name of a vampire truck stop in all of the Dusk To Dawn movies.
Girlfriend: "What's the name of the actor who plays that ugly Indian bartender of the Titty Twister".

Me: (Entralled by the topless dancers) Huh?
by Alfie The Horndog September 17, 2005
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21 Grams

About 1/20th of a pound. This is the amount of weight you lose the instant you die. Some say it's the weight of your spirit or soul.
She was so sweet before she passed away. Heaven gained another 21 Grams of sugar.
by Alfie The Horndog September 22, 2005
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hulk

Any tall, stocky, broad-shouldered man.
The Godfather felt safe until the two hulks that were with him got gunned down.
by Alfie The Horndog September 22, 2005
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stocky

Confusing adjective because there are multiple definitions in different dictionaries...

1) Big man with broad shoulders.
2) Short round man.
Girl #1: I went out with this tall guy last night, he said he was stocky in his emails, but he was short and round.
Girl #2: Oh... then he was stocky.
by Alfie The Horndog September 22, 2005
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fucktard

Noun. A combination of the word "fuck" (to fornicate) and the word "tard" (to delay). Therefore, a fucktard is a girl who won't let you fornicate with her until like the third or fourth date.
by Alfie The Horndog July 14, 2005
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American Idol

It's rigged. I mean think about it... over 60,000 people supposedly try out for it and yet they have so much early footage of people who make it to the top 12...

And they purposely let absolutely horrible singers through to see the judges, because mocking bad singers is a huge attraction to the show...

Also... notice the unusual balance of the runner ups and winners of the show... I mean first season... an attractive white young female wins - runner up is a young white male, then a large black male - runner up an geeky looking white male, then an average sized black female - runner up is a larger younger white female, then another attractive white female - runner up attractive white male, then an older white male - runner up a young white female.

In order to maintain this balance, I think the winner this year will be a young black male or female... and the only one who really matches this is Jordin Sparks. Go Jordin! Even if you were already selected to win, early on.

Despite being rigged though, it is pretty darn entertaining, if you don't have anything better to do.
GF: Hey, isn't American Idol is on...
ME: Who cares? Its as rigged as Boot Camp or Judge Judy.
by Alfie The Horndog March 10, 2007
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