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Welcome to the Internet 

Have a look around
Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
We've got mountains of content
Some better, some worse
If none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first
Welcome to the internet
Come and take a seat
Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?
There's no need to panic
This isn't a test, haha
Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest
Welcome to the internet
What would you prefer?
Would you like to fight for civil rights or tweet a racial slur?
Be happy
Be horny
Be bursting with rage
We got a million different ways to engage
Welcome to the internet
Put your cares aside
Here's a tip for straining pasta
Here's a nine-year-old who died
We got movies, and doctors, and fantasy sports
And a bunch of colored pencil drawings
Of all the different characters in Harry Potter fucking each other
Welcome to the internet
Hold on to your socks
'Cause a random guy just kindly sent you photos of his cock
They are grainy and off-putting
He just sent you more
Don't act surprised, you know you like it, you whore
See a man beheaded
Get offended, see a shrink
Show us pictures of your children
Tell us every thought you think
Start a rumor, buy a broom
Or send a death threat to a boomer
Or DM a girl and groom her
Do a Zoom or find a tumor in your
Here's a healthy breakfast option
You should kill your mom
Here's why women never fuck you
Here's how you can build a bomb
he sent you a pic of his cock, you are in the Welcome to the Internet.
Welcome to the Internet by Reflex03 February 1, 2023

welcome to the internet 

A phrase used in online forums, news pages, social networks, when someone sees some old-as-dirt thing on the internet for the first time and is very excited to share it with everyone else.
ZOMG! Check out this grape stomp video! This lady's stomping grapes and falls and hurts herself! It's freakin' hilarious!

Yeah, welcome to the internet.

Welcome to the Internet 

a song that is written by Bo Burnham

Welcome to the Internet 

1. It is a song by Bo Burnham
2. It could also be used to reply to stupid comments, normally on YouTube.
¹ Person 1: Welcome to the Internet
Person 2: Have a look around

² Person 1: Omg guys stop using the 🤓 emoji it's so annoying!!!
Person 2: Welcome to the Internet!
More from Urban Dictionary
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
Literally "dirty" pronounced with a West Indian accent. Can also have a positive connotation, for example Sean Paul's album title "Dutty Rock".
"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
Word of the Day on October 1, 2026
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