von blucher

Creepy imagination wizard.

"She pulled a von blucher on me and I nearly shit my pants!"

von blucher by Fahren Heit January 2, 2018

Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher 

While the Duke of Wellington was fighting off Napoleon from the front there was also some other guy who ambushed Napoleon from the back. His name was Blucher. He was an old man and didn't really care for his life nor what happened to him and his regiment. But he knew that this fat little Corsican shit needed to be wiped off the planet.

And Blucher didn't take no shit. One time in some battle I completely forgot but know the anecdotes, Blucher's horse got shot down and he fell to the ground with his dead horse on top of him. He had to wait until the bloody massacre was over so the survivors could lift his old ass up from his dead horse.

That's how badass he was, and let me tell ya if it weren't for Blucher, Wellington probably would never have won that battle. Maybe not, who knows. Nevertheless they both PWNED Napoleon at Waterloo. It was such an awesome victory that meanwhile when Thomas Jefferson was doing his stuff, he read the news in Europe about how Napoleon got OWNED in Waterloo! And guess what, he shat in his pants.

Historian #1: Dude, Wellington was such a camper! Blücher was like totally like the main force on the battlefield, like he totally like destroyed Napoleon with like an ambush. Like it was sooooo cool.

Historian #2: OMG dude, everyone knows that Wellington was like NOT a camper and like Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher was only the finishing touch! Like OMG you don't know shit!

Historian #1: I refuse to listen to such bigotry! BEGONE!

Historian #2: Neigh sire, the truth is here to stay!

Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher by BullshitPoster September 25, 2012