1. A city where there's not much to do, not much to see, and not much reason to live here. There are basically no good jobs, plenty of illegal mexicans, and well beyond your fill of steriotypical
black gangbangers. And apparently the only requirement to get a license to drive, is learning how to parallel park. Valdosta is
home to the Blazers, the Wild Adventures theme park, the Moody Air Force Base, a Golden Corral, lots of stray animals, many all-
black neighborhoods, dollar-stores with barred doors and windows, people that can't drive worth shit, routine
car wrecks, crooked cops that enjoy beating people senseless, and yours truly. All the big city experience, but in a smaller, more
redneck package. Stop on by!
Guy: Hey, did you hear about the
car wreck in valdosta, georgia?
JNJ: Which
one?
Guy: The
one where nobody died.
JNJ: Nobody died!? There IS a God!
Guy: YEEHAH! Now I'm gonna go have sex with my 12 year old cousin/sister/daughter/uncle Joe!
JNJ: Tell the cops that I said "hey", as they bash your skull in.
Guy: Will do!