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touch ass 

Used when someone is being too intense, irritable, combative, or distracted and they need to relax. It means that they need to get laid and stop annoying everyone else because they have not been able to release their sexual frustration. They need to join the "real world" by benefiting from having sex.

It is a play on words with "touch grass" having a similar meaning but with a sexual emphasis.
You haven't stopped talking about Settlers of Catan all day. You need to go touch ass.

My ex won't stop bugging me and trying to make my life hell. She needs a new boyfriend so she can touch ass and get off my back.
touch ass by Oolated Squiggs February 6, 2025
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National touch ass day

Everybody gets to touch ass because its national touch ass day every april 12th
Boys im gonna touch her ass beacause its national touch ass day

The Mud-ass Touch 

(n)A play on words describing someone's ability to fuck everything up. When everything that person does (touches) turns to shit.
1. Spellcheck doesn't pick up shitty grammer- you've got the mud-ass touch.
The Mud-ass Touch by BLynch March 14, 2008

ass touch 

When a man shoves an entire finger up his ass and proceeds to chase his friend around playing a “shitty” game of tag.
ass touch by White Retard February 7, 2018

national ass touch day 

A day were anyone can touch anyone’s ass

It’s a FREE pass to touch an ASS
It is national ass touch day imma go grab dat thicc white girls ass 👅

Don't touch me tall ass! 

When someone taller than you gets in your way or stumbles onto you.
Particularly used by Richard Goranski.
Rich: Yo, Don't touch me tall ass!
Jeremy Heere: Sorry I was just trying to get to my--
*Rich writes on Jeremy's backpack*
Rich: You wash that off, YOU'RE DEAD.

Don't touch me tall ass! 

Phrase occupied when someone taller stumbles onto you or gets in your way.
Mainly used by Richard Goranski from the musical Be More Chill
Rich: Yo, Don't touch me tall ass!
Jeremy Heere: Sorry, I was just trying to get to my--
*Rich writes on Jeremy's backpack*
Rich: You wash that off, YOU'RE DEAD.