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tommie network 

Stream of ejaculate flowing from woman to woman to woman and eventually leading us back to a few chads at Carlson School of Management. It does not mean "we'll have buddies in esteemed positions who'll line you up with jobs/internships/careers SIMPLY because you paid 40,000 a year to do shit at St Thomas--it means 1/4th of the womenfolk here fucked some dudes at Carlson and wound up becoming senior vice presidents at 23. hahaha what a schmuck buying into our con game"
Advisor: "Oy! we have a GREAT tommie network, when you graduate you'll be getting offers for career-launchpad positions! (but in reality only the sloots, the well-connected and the family-business-owning students will find high-level careers heheheheh...we say we love egalitarianism while really conning the 99.999%! "

Gullible students: "OY! so you mean if I pay 40,000 a year to study vocabulary terms but 'trust your plan' I'll wind up an Investment Banker or CFO at age 22? (for the record, Urban Dictionary, this is LITERALLY what Dr Ernest Owens and Michael Devaugh promise)"

Savvy students: "Oh tommie network? TOMMIE NETWORK ? sigh...guess I better bring my umbrella....sighghhgh..."
tommie network by AnonemousMarmot November 8, 2020
Urban Dictionary Merch

Tommie Network 

Stream of ejaculate dripping from woman to woman to woman and eventually back to some dudes at Carlson School of Management.

You won't get a job from the so-called "Tommie Network" but can guarantee yourself to pick up a few STD's, well worth 300,000$ in school.
St Thomas "Apply to St Thomas! We have a great School network called the Tommie Network! It basically GaUarAnTeeS you to land a bUSiNeSs JoB befORe you even graduate! Tee-hee! all you have to do is take 3 years of theology, 3 of philosophy and 4 years of bullshit vocab! then youre set!"

Students, naive: "sounds great! lemme sell my liver..."

Alumni: "A Tommie network? A Tommie Network you say? Better take your gulashes, then."
Tommie Network by BasedDe September 17, 2020

Tommie Network 

Alleged to be a consortium of alumni from St Thomas who will get students tier-1 jobs and internships.

It's actually the stream of semen going from woman to woman to woman, leading back to a few dudes at CSOM
Admissions counselors: "Come to St Thomas! We have a broad Tommie Network which all-but-guarantees you'll get a decent corporate job after college!"

Savvy students: "sigh...better bring my galoshes then....siiiiighhhh......."
Tommie Network by AnonemousMarmot September 28, 2020
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