telecommuting 

The ability to find yourself fully surrounded by incompetent idiots while working from the comfort of your own home.

I may be working in my pj's, but through the magic of telecommuting, I'm still stuck dealing with these morons all day.

telecommuting by annoyed12345 May 11, 2011

reverse telecommuting 

Bringing personal work to the office: paying bills, playing games and reading online newspapers on company time (OCT).

reverse telecommuting by C.J.Matrix September 9, 2003

telecommutants 

telecommutants spend all or most of their workday at coffee chains, using computers or other telecommunications equipment. The mere cost of a latte and low fat chocolate twist entitles telecommutants to appropriate rent-free virtual office space to themselves with impunity.

"I'll get the coffee and you find us a table."

"I would, but the whole place is invaded with telecommutants!"

telecommutants by relaxfrancis October 13, 2009

telecommute 

the act of impersonating an actual real employee by the implementation of various technological devices and equipment. the telecommuter is actually home laughing at his colleagues and will occasionally send an email to the office or provide an added view on a topic which no one remembers discussing.

I can't believe some people get paid the same as I do to stay home.....I better start telecommuting too!

telecommute by MintyLeila July 21, 2005

reverse telecommuting 

1. To communicate with yourself using items such as phone, fax, e-mail; in attempt to appear busy or doing ones job.

2. Speaking aloud to the other you in the sub-conscience or quantum realm.

1. "I didn't have time to finish the report due to...hang on. I've got a call."

2. The weirdo on the street corner isn't talking to himself. He's reverse telecommuting.

reverse telecommuting by Dane C. Eiteneier - Esoteric January 16, 2008

Telecommutilation 

Any of the type of disturbing, threatening, or grossly uncomfortable phone calls which leaves the recipient of said call feeling like they were just gang raped by a room full of meth-addicted menopausal yetis.

AN EXAMPLE OF TELECOMMUTILATION

*Ring*
YOU: "Hello?"
HER: "Andy, it's Felicity."
YOU: "What's up?"
HER: "Remember you stood me up last Thursday? Remember that guy I introduced you to, the big guy, MMA fighter, Dirk Rockhard? He's my boyfriend now and he said to tell you he's going to rip your fucking spleen out through your asshole."
You: "..."

Telecommutilation by Schuyler The Cat September 1, 2011