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A solo version of a blumpkin usually performed by jerkin it while taking a dump. It is usually performed by a Cringelord to the memory of some unrequited love. If the performer is short a couple ribs, either through surgical means or birth defect, may also be done full-simulation style.
Person A: Hey man, where did Cringelord go? he isn't bothering your friend again is he? I mean he's been after her so long when she's made it clear she just isn't that into him.

Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.

Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?

Person B: Yup...
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by evilleppy June 13, 2020
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Jun 1 Word of the Day
The two states of being are as a human being, or a hungry ghost. Semi-regularly you need to ask yourself which you are. Sometimes it is human. Others, alas, it is hungry ghost.

The hungry ghost seeks validity outside of themselves. Someone pining for an indifferent ex is a hungry ghost. Someone who arrives alone at 6:30 on Saturday night to a pub is probably a hungry ghost. Obsessive checking of mobile phones, chat sites or networks are clear signs that one is a hungry ghost.

The best thing to do is just stay home and ride it out. Read a book. Find some good clean fun.
Mate: How are you?
Dumped: I'm a hungry ghost, man.

Mate: What'd ya do last night?
HG: Urg. I hungry ghosted around The Oxford for a few hours, then walked home past her house, and HIS car was there...

Mate: Why'd you call man?! It's just rampant hungry ghostery.
by Dr Winterbourne February 16, 2009
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