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petoskey brain 

Used to describe an individual that is so mentally handicapped that their brain matter has regressed to that of what resembles a "Petoskey Stone".

With a completely flat and smooth brain (also diagnosed as SBS (Smooth Brain Syndrome), the individual is left only with enough intelligence for basic communication and survival. A Petoskey Brained individual will assume they're much more intelligent than they are and cause stress for those that are around or work with said individual. With no capacity to tell right from wrong or even solve basic problems, their assumptions become their reality, making them some of the most annoying people to exist in the universe.

There is no cure for a Petoskey Brain once diagnosed and any effected individuals are best left isolated in a secure room that the diseased thoughts cant spread or in some cases burying the individuals resolves the situation. Though potentially increasing the likelyhood of what is known as a Petoskey Zombie emerging at the next full moon.
Thurman: Hey, did you hear Ryan still can't even spell his own name correctly?
Merman: Yeah he's had a Petoskey Brain for awhile now.
Thurman: Really? I didn't know he had SBS
Merman: Yeah, smooth brained as they come. Be careful cause he's been known to drool on people.
petoskey brain by Dr. Big Brain August 16, 2019
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